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Jourdan, u OK?
Some sexy, villain music appeared for selfie-taking Blake. "I'm nothing like this show has ever seen before," Blake said. Actually, dude, we have seen a douche called Blake on the show before. New Blake sauntered into the cocktail party, telling the guys he "100% nailed her". Ew. Can't wait for him to leave the house in a couple of weeks and then blame editing for his storyline.
Villain number two arrived: Ryan. Ryan is looking for "spontan-uey-ty" in a woman. One could assume he meant spontaneity, but trust me, there are bigger issues to deal with here.
"I'm always looking for love," Ryan told Sophie, his tongue darting weirdly around his mouth like he thought that was seductive. Ryan, please turn around and go straight back down that driveway.
Sounds like a new Tim Tam tbh.
Whoever gets the Double Delight gets not one, but two single dates! That's basically more than I've had in my whole lifetime!
Sophie finally entered the cocktail party, and Osher said it was "SO GOOD" to see her, like he hadn't already seen her an hour or so ago. Before Sophie could even give a speech, Ryan intercepted her and stole her away for some time alone. God, the guys are even more intense than the girls from last season.
As it turned out 26-year-old Ryan wanted to question Sophie about whether she was there for the "right reasons". Ryan, buddy, are you? "I'm skeptical about this whole thing," he said echoing Australia's feelings about him.
This game always ends well!!!!
"Never have I ever been cheated on," Sophie said. Jourdan, our hide and seek guy, started crying! But that's not even the weirdest part, fam! He's actually never been cheated on, his ex just accused him of cheating. Lord, I am confused. Men are so, so strange.
It was the two with the man-buns vs. the two who... looked like every other white guy. Uncle Sam shook out his dirty old mullet, and got a-struttin'. Hayden, batting for the short-haired team, did some robot moves and went Zoolander on us, ripping out his underwear from under his pants. It's weird how I had ovaries before this show, and now both have shrivelled up and died.
Uncle Sam then did an "undie-run" and jumped into the pool, his voiceover telling us shrinkage could "be a problem" in the cold weather. But it worked for him: Uncle Sam got the Double Delight rose.
Jourdan somehow managed to get a rose, and limped up to accept it. WHY WAS HE LIMPING? CHANNEL 10? DID HE CRY SO HARD HE GOT A CRAMP IN HIS LEG?
We said goodbye to Jamie and Chad. I honestly had to look up those names again, otherwise I would not have remembered.