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24 Questions I Have About "How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days" As An Adult

"Frost yourselves"

OK first of all, no shade to How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. It's one of the all-time greats and who am I to tell you otherwise?

But I recently rewatched it and I've got a couple of questions.

Here's a recap of the plot: Andie Anderson works at Composure, a women's magazine. She's writing a column in which she starts dating a guy, only to drive him away by making all the ~mistakes~ that single women commonly make. Meanwhile, Ben Barry works for an ad agency where his boss challenges him to make a woman fall in love with him in 10 days in order to secure the account he wants to work on. You can see where I'm going with this: They unknowingly pick each other.

1. OK first things first: How could Andie afford to get cabs all over New York City when all she did was write one monthly column for Composure magazine?

2. In the same vein, does anyone actually ride their motorbike everywhere, including to and from a black-tie event, in NYC?

3. This is more of a statement than a question, but please let us acknowledge that Ben is a massive jerk.

4. His comments about women are sexist, but they also just don't make any sense.

5. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely team Andie. But isn't Andie also kind of a jerk to Michelle?

6. Talking of mean characters, isn't Lana, the editor of Composure, the worst?

7. Back to Ben. Why does he have a basketball hoop in his apartment?

8. And how do both he and Andie have such luxurious offices?

9. Right, we need to address some of the obvious sexism. Andie's entire article is built on the premise of doing "everything girls do wrong in relationships".

10. And I am sorry but I refuse to believe that some of the things Andie thinks "girls do wrong" actually happen. For example, in a bid to drive Ben away, Andie fills his apartment with teddy bears, a signed photograph of herself, and a fern. Would anyone actually do this?

11. Another thing that "girls do wrong in relationships" is buy their partner a dog. A) No one does this. B) They should.

12. Not only does Andie buy Ben a dog (kind + cute), she also buys her, Ben, and the dog matching clothes. I ask again, HOW IS THIS NOT THE BEST THING EVER??

13. Another thing that apparently "girls do wrong" is take the men they are dating to watch chick flicks.

14. And Celine Dion concerts!

15. Another thing Andie does is name Ben's penis. Now I just don't believe that this is a common mistake women make.

16. But what I really want to question is Ben's reaction to her suggested name.

17. It's very problematic that a recurring theme of the movie is Andie accusing Ben of thinking she is fat.

18. And then she makes an album of photoshopped images of her future children with Ben. Again, I ask: IS THIS A COMMON PROBLEM FOR WOMEN?

19. Another thing Andie makes Ben do is see a couples therapist within the first week of them dating. My question, and I'm sure you're sensing a theme, is: Have any women ever done this????

20. I ask you: Do women commonly buy their partners ferns and cry when they die?

21. And is it unreasonable for them not to eat the lamb their partners make because they are vegetarian?

22. Time for some more lighthearted questions. How does Andie have access to a sunny rooftop in NYC on a Wednesday afternoon?

23. And my penultimate question is: If Ben and Andie were both just using each other for their careers (which they were), why were they so mad at each other when they found out?

24. And whyyyyyyy did they end up together?