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Aziz Ansari Kicked Off SNL With A Fire Monologue About Donald Trump

"Beyoncé ain't moving, I ain't moving."

Aziz Ansari made history on Saturday as the first person of South Asian descent to host Saturday Night Live — and he kicked it all off with a fire monologue about President Donald Trump.

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NBC / Via

Ansari started his set by calling Trump "the Chris Brown of politics."

NBC / Via

Ansari said some people voted for Trump with the same mindset people use when it comes to Brown’s music: “I’m just here for the tunes, not the extracurriculars.”

Then there are those Trump supporters that Ansari labels the lowercase KKK — as in, the people that see his win as a chance to be openly racist again.

NBC / Via

The successes of Barack Obama, Empire, Hamilton, and more have made the past few years pretty darn rough for these white people, Ansari joked.

Asking every minority to go back to their native countries isn't a realistic solution to white angst!

NBC / Via

"Is that really the plan, by the way?" he asked. "We're all gonna move? All the minorities?! Forty-something percent of the country?!"

Ansari also addressed Islamophobia in his monologue, suggesting that the media should show Muslims doing regular things, like eating nachos, to curb people's fear.

"Every time someone is Arabic and praying [in a movie] that scary-ass music from Homeland is underneath them. It's terrifying," he said. "If you want to end Islamophobia, change that music!"

But then things got serious.

Ansari pleaded with the new president to give a speech denouncing white supremacy and the hate crimes committed by racists.

"Don’t tweet about me being lame or the show,” he urged Trump, who has repeatedly criticized SNL. “Write a speech. A real speech. Because these people are out there, and it’s pissing a lot of people off.”

Ansari then closed his monologue on a hopeful note, telling those who are worried about Trump's presidency that they're going to be OK.

NBC / Via

"If Day One is any indication," he said, referring to the huge Women's March demonstrations around the world on Saturday, "you are part of the largest group of angry people I have ever seen.”

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