1.
He’s not ignoring you he just recently bought separate shampoo and conditioner and is trying to figure out which one goes in his hair first
2.
dudes be in the dm’s like: hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey wow fuck you sIut hey
3.
Crazy how dudes can hold back tears for a lifetime but cum in like 30 seconds
4.
Do men grab other men's waists when they are trying to get by or...?
5.
if only i could convince myself i deserve as much as men at airports think they deserve
6.
every day men leave their homes with no bag, no water bottle, no lip balm, no hand sanitizer, no extra layer in case they get cold, just keys and a wallet shoved into their pocket. chaotic and reckless
7.
boys: do u like girls with big boob or big butt better the same boys: i wash my face with dish soap
8.
girls be like “I’m a sapiosexual” and it’s like ehhhhhhhh I’ve met your boyfriend
9.
Guys be 5’6 talking bout “what would you do if I was there rn” idk pet you?
10.
“Nashville isn’t ready for the boys” really?? What are you gonna do? Get drunk and buy vodka sodas for a bunch of girls who want nothing to do with you and pass out on the floor of the 2 person hotel room you split between 9 guys?? Nashville is ready baby.
11.
cultural impact: █ █ █ █ ＿ Vibrators Men
12.
sometimes therapy is helpful, sometimes therapy is a middle aged woman watching a viral tiktok the guy you’re dating made and looking up at you in disbelief saying “this? this is the boy you like?”
13.
men love to date powerful women for 3-8 weeks
14.
i refuse to ever teach my daughters the archaic concept of “losing one’s virginity” as if some baby-dicked boy who drives a Honda Civic is really taking something special from you lmaaaoo grow up and overthrow the government
15.
nobody: white boys: i just miss her so much BRO
16.
no don’t make your tinder age range 18-22 you’re literally 36 years old aha
17.
found out my mom drove HERSELF to the hospital when she was going into labor bc she was mad at my dad for not giving her enough attention and wanted to birth me by herself bc “men are incapable”... so yes I am the son of a petty queen and, yes, I will carry on her legacy.