21 Witchy Tweets That Go Out To The Astrology Girls
This post is dedicated to Stevie Nicks and the moon.
Here are a bunch of tweets about astrology and ~witchy-ness~ that have made me, a self-identifying Astrology Girlâ˘, laugh. A LOT. If you also think these tweets are funny, be sure to follow the accounts to make your Twitter timeline a funnier (and witchier!!!) place! đđŤ
1.
I like astrology because I can bully people just for being born
2.
men hating women for liking astrology .. u literally play a game of spreadsheets where u pretend to be the manager of a football team
3.
people will believe in the government but not astrology
4.
2 months ago him: ur a witch wtf now him: do the cards i need advice
5.
you are not the daughter of the witches they couldnât burn. you are the daughter of the senior VP of consumer lending at a mid-sized regional bank
6.
fuck your astrology sign what type of antidepressants are you on
7.
Girls with Ouija board: omg ok does Josh have a crush on Katie Me, the spirit of a Medieval serf: man I don't fuckin know. Sure
8.
economy is fr just astrology for straight men. they get so moody cause the NASDAQ is in retrograde
9.
ladies you have $5 to build the perfect man $300 - tall $200 - smart $400 - has a good job $3 - his driving makes your stomach upset $2 - makes fun of you for believing in astrology $500 - attractive
10.
girls believe in astrology but donât believe in themselves. breaks my heart
11.
saying âastrology isnât realâ - boring - tired - makes u seem like a bit of a dick saying âI hate when ppl have funâ - more accurate - doesnât drag astrology into it - more aligned w ur taurus rising anyway
12.
Robert pattinson, a taurus, said that his favourite scent is âwhen youâre in love with someone, and the smell is incredibleâ because it âbrings out an animal side of being human.â A fucking taurus said this BUT astrology isnât real..
13.
In Astrology we dont say âmy love life is so shittyâ we say âsaturn is in my 7th houseâ and I think thats beautiful
14.
no one: people who love astrology getting ready to read you based off your sign:
15.
Boys: astrology SUCKS!!! So dumbđż Boys: what does it say for my signđĽş
16.
people are like âastrology is a meaningless human constructâ but also âitâs 2 oâclock in the afternoonâ
17.
i donât give a fuck about astrology i just ask about it to hear pretty girls talk about me and describe me
18.
why are stra*ght men so against astrology and personality tests???? it's like they're born with this vendetta against trying to know yourself more????? is introspection such a bad thing
19.
If astrology isnât real then whyâd the full moon in Aquarius do that
20.
âastrology isnât realâ literally nothing is real your name is gibberish but you still answer to it bc you crave identity and structure you pathetic fucking featherless biped
21.
How do people just raw dog life without astrology and witchcraft?