1. The burn.
2. The double burn.
3. Weather forecasts that scream: "this isn't summer, this is hell".
4. Newspapers that confirm the theory.
5. One shitty fan in the whole house.
6. Three fucking words. On fucking repeat.
7. Feet sticking to the fucking bitumen.
8. Thongs left in the car.
9. Shops selling out of thongs.
10. Thong blowout.
11. Endless bloody prawns.
12. New arrivals moaning about the heat.
13. Weather that can't make up its fucking mind.
14. Summer sportswear.
15. Summer sports fans.
16. Crocs tan lines.
17. Technology meltdown.
18. Sharks on the beach.
19. Warning signs for sharks on the beach.
20. Trees trying to kill you.
21. Endless fucking flies.
22. This horror.
23. And this fucking madness.
Stay hydrated Australia!
