Look at this pizza. It's a beautiful pizza, right?
And look at these pizzas. Yummmmm.
So can someone please tell me why the fuck someone would ruin such a perfect food with RANCH?
Ranch tastes like feet that have been bathing in milk for three days straight.
AND it looks like a bird crapped all over your pizza.
NO. NO. NO.
WHAT IS THIS SOUP SHIT?!?!?!
IT MAKES NO SENSE.
Just say no, kids.
TL;DR: Pizza is perfect on its own. It is delicious. It is delightful. No need to drown it in a puddle of ill-tasting liquid hell that belongs on a salad.
OK, let's figure this out once and for all...
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