We asked the BuzzFeed Community, "What's one thing you wish you could tell body-shamers?" Here are the most impactful responses:
1. Empathize.
"Instead of spending your time trolling around on the internet with the hopes of ruining someone's day, change your negative messages into positive views and use your energy to help yourself. Take a moment to empathize, self-reflect, and make yourself and the world a better place."
2. You look like an insecure asshole.
"When you speak badly about another person's body, it doesn't make that person look bad. It makes YOU look like an insecure asshole."
3. Look deeper.
"My size might be the first thing you notice, but it does NOT give you insight into who I am."
4. Don't make assumptions.
"Just because I'm overweight doesn't mean I don't work out. Though I've been exercising hardcore to lose weight for several months, I still have people come up to me in the gym to give me 'advice' and teachers in exercise classes that I frequent assume I'm a first timer because of how I look. Not only does it often disrupt my workout, it totally shatters my confidence by reminding me that no matter how much progress I've made, people will still only see me as fat. Sure, I'm nowhere close to my goal body, but don't make assumptions about my lifestyle based only on what you see at that point."
5. I can be proud of myself.
"Just because I am happy with my body does not mean I am telling you that your body, which is different from mine, is bad in any way. I can be proud of myself and encourage everyone to be proud of themselves as well."
6. If I want to change my body, I will do it for me.
"You just shame me due to insecurities you might not even know that you have. I'm fine with my body the way it is, and I definitely won't change it for someone that doesn't even know the person inside this body. If I want to change my body, I will do it for me, not for anyone like you."
7. I've worked so hard.
"It’s not about you, I’ve worked so hard to get the muscles I have and I actually don’t care that you think is intimidating OR that you’d never want to look like that. I love my body. Telling me 'I want to be toned, not bulky like you' won’t make you like your body more."
8. Move on.
"Simply, Why? Why does someone else’s body trigger you so much you have to comment? How does their individual life and choices affect you at all?! Move on, do you, and let them do them."
9. One tiny comment might not hurt you...
"Please remember that one tiny comment that might not hurt you could be absolutely devastating to someone else."
10. My stretch marks are mine.
"That after years of repeat pregnancy loss, my stretch marks are mine to own. Each one of them represents the privilege I was given to finally bring a son into this world, and he left his mark of love on me to remind me what a gift it was."
11. What do you get out of it?
"Just why?! Why does someone’s body OFFEND others so much?! What do you get from putting down someone’s looks?!"
12. It doesn't matter.
"Whether I am happy or not with my body, I don't need to hear what you think about me. It doesn't matter if you think I am too fat or if you think I am too skinny. At the end of the day, the only opinion that should matter to me about MY body is MY opinion."
13. It is not my responsibility.
"I am my own person and I do not exist for your consumption. It is not my responsibility to make sure I adhere to YOUR standards of beauty."
14. Literally no one asked.
"Literally no one asked you for your opinion on their body. Picture this: you've struggled with an eating disorder for years. You've hated your body, cried over it, done everything in your power to change it. Your friends and family are worried sick about you. You are slowly beginning to raise your self confidence, beginning to get healthy and feel better about yourself. And some fucking idiot comes along and body-shames you. Can you imagine how that would feel? How that could set someone back to where they were years ago? You could undo years of recovery with one statement, that you could just as easily have kept to yourself. It's time to grow up, keep your opinions to yourself, and have some respect for the way other people have worked to love their body."
15. You'll always be an asshole.
“I can always lose weight, but you’ll always be an asshole.”
16. Cellulite has nothing to do with weight.
"Cellulite has nothing to do with weight/percent body fat. I’m in the gym six days a week, I have gotten down to 16% body fat and STILL have visible cellulite. It’s literally the makeup of your skin and isn’t indicative of your fitness level AT ALL."
18. Being fat is not the worst quality.
"I don’t owe anyone an explanation for the way my body looks. Being fat is not the worst quality a human can have. Is being fat really as bad as being a racist, sexist, liar, abuser, thief, fraud? Good people and bad people come in all shapes and sizes. The shape of a person’s body is not an indication of their character. And if you don’t like my body, look away."
19. I do not exist to give you sexual thoughts.
"I do not exist to give you sexual thoughts, so if I don't, okeydoke. That doesn't give you the right to belittle me, call me names, or make weird faces at me."
20. I know I don't have a butt.
"Yes I know I don’t have a butt. I’ve been told it more times than I can count. And I’m totally okay with not having one!"
21. At least keep your comments to yourself.
"Even if we are fat or skinny by choice, as opposed to something we can't help, then it's still none of your business! It doesn't have to be caused by an uncontrollable disease or condition for us to be human beings who deserve love and acceptance. If you can't give us the basic decency of that, then at least keep your comments to yourself, because we know that the last of your concerns is our actual health and well-being."
22. There are illnesses and diseases.
"Being overweight doesn’t always reflect laziness. There are illnesses and diseases that can affect a person’s body weight, and some of those diseases are incurable. Also, some people don’t like to discuss their personal medical history, so even their friends and family may not be aware of their struggles. Just remember that not everything is as simple as it may seem."
23. You don't know my story.
"You don't know my story. I may not be thin or even a 'normal' weight, but I've lost 150 pounds without your help. I don't need your (usually totally wrong) unsolicited advice now." —rachelw4a768284e
24. It is okay for you to not love my body.
"It is okay for me to love my body. It is okay for you to not love my body. It is not okay for you to comment on my body without me asking you to."
25. Being skinny is not the same as being healthy.
"Stop disguising your fatphobia with concern for other people's health! Being skinny doesn't not equal being healthy. I have been super skinny all my life, and for a big portion of it I had terrible eating habits, so much it ended up with me having really high cholesterol levels and going on a prescribed diet. No one ever questioned what I ate or not. You just wanna degrade people and pretend you are being nice. It's a horrible thing to do. People have different metabolisms and body types. Again for the people in the back: BEING SKINNY IS NOT THE SAME AS BEING HEALTHY!"
26. Just be kind.
"How would you feel if someone took your biggest insecurity and made a point to make you feel even worse about it? Do you have crooked teeth? More hair than someone? Well, let’s see how you feel when someone attacks it, especially online. Just be kind. We all live in this world together and it only works if there is kindness."
27. No one owes anyone.
"No one owes anyone health. It is not a moral imperative to be healthy. No one has to behave as a good fat person, or a thin body that is temporarily broken."
28. You don't live here.
"My body might not be a temple but it is a house. My house. You do not live here. I do. Leave my house alone."
And that's how it's done, folks!
