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Bow Down, Because Ina Garten Is Our One True Queen

"How easy was that?"

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Listen up, peasants: For too long, the human race has not acknowledged the most fabulous, the classiest, and the most important member of our species. Ina Garten, aka "The Barefoot Contessa," is our One True Queen, and should be worshipped as such.

Yes, we all know Ina is HBIC in the kitchen. But it's about damn time we recognized her as the TRUE AMERICAN ROYALTY that she is.

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They sell like crazy. Like, several have been on the New York Times bestseller list. WHAT ABOUT YOUR FAVES???

Basically every other Food Network chef is just LUCKY to be in the presence of her aura. Giada included.

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She also makes everything seem SO easy on her show, even though she's juggling a roast chicken, a flourless chocolate cake, and gourmet mac 'n' cheese at the same time.

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"How easy was that?" FUCKING DIFFICULT, ACTUALLY. But you nailed it, Ina.

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Then there is Ina's impeccable sense of style. She almost always rocks one of her oversized button-down blue shirts. It's usually chambray, because she's classy like that.

She also knows how to TURN UP way better than all y'all. Get on her level!!!

.@fernleaf1013 Cosmopolitans! Anything in a martini glass just tastes better!

Ina Garten@inagartenFollow

.@fernleaf1013 Cosmopolitans! Anything in a martini glass just tastes better!

11:40 AM - 23 Oct 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

Wait... how have we not mentioned Ina's husband/man candy Jeffrey yet?

Yes, Ina and Jeffrey are WITHOUT A DOUBT THE CUTEST COUPLE EVER. Even though Ina doesn't know where Jeffrey is half the time.

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Ladies and gentlemen, THIS is what true love looks like. We should all be so lucky as to marry someone who can cook like Ina.

Ina also surrounds herself with a bevy of celebrities, because why would she EVER hang out with petty commoners. Here she is taking a selfie with a fan.

Why deal with plebeians when you can chill with Tony winner and Frozen star Idina Menzel? Ina's friend motto: If you don't have at least one letter out of an EGOT, get the hell away.

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Oh, and she doesn't just cook amazing food and surround herself with fabulous friends. Ina is also a former White House nuclear energy analyst.

Which means she isn't just WAY more fabulous than you and me. She's also a certifiable smartypants.