Your car is blackYou live in Southern California.You used to take koobideh and rice to lunch when you were in grade school.Your parents pickled torshi for you the day you were born.You are either a doctor, a lawyer, or you are in real estate."Children of Heaven" is your favorite movie.Every one of your uncles has a gold Rolex.You have a gold Rolex.Your dad showers himself with cologne.You can write read/write in Farsi.You have so many Persian rugs in your house that you don't even use some of them.Your mom’s solution to every pain you have is to put eggs on it.Your idea of a refreshing drink is carbonated yogurt.You drink chai multiple times a day.There is no difference between what you wear when you go to a club or to a grocery store.You go to Las Vegas at least once a year.You tell people you know Maz Jobrani.Your parents wash plastic plates and cups to reuse them.Your mom has dyed her hair blonde before.Your favorite ice cream flavor is pistacchio.You have a bidet in your bathroom.You don't consider it a meal if there wasn't any khoresht involved.It takes you three hours to leave a party because you have to say goodbye to everyone 3 times or else they'll be offended.Watching "Shahs of Sunset" is a family event for you.Your mom prounces it "EhStarbucks".
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