ATTENTION! I have an announcement to make.
I know what some of you are thinking.
Well, I racked up the receipts and compiled them here.
You expect to finally be treated like an adult by the world.
But your parents still own you because they literally pay all of your bills.
And the o*ds still write articles about how people your age are single-handedly ruining restaurants and the housing market.
You think you'll be able to roll into every bar no questions asked.
But you'll still get stopped by the bouncer because you have a severe case of fetus-face.
You'll have so many weekend plans...
...except most of your friends aren't 21 yet, so you're sitting around the bar reflecting on your decisions...
...and you realize that bars are pretty much like the parties you attended when you were underage.
You'd like to go out all the time...
...until you realize how exhausting it is.
A touch of good news: You don't have to have someone buy alcohol for you.
Bad news: You'll be bombarded by children asking you to buy for them.
You think about how you can get someone cute to buy your drinks...
...only to realize that you don't like human interaction, so you decide to buy your own.
So in short, being 21 means nothing.
