You can’t pretend to care, especially if something's boring AF.
And most of the time, you can’t stop laughing at your own jokes and comments.
You can't meet someone and instantly become besties. Your humor is an “acquired taste.”
And you can’t just meet someone who is completely non-sarcastic. They won't understand you.
But you also can’t just meet another sarcastic person. It’s a whole process of exchanging jokes, quips, and insults — because they get it.
You can't text or post anything without people misinterpreting you.
You also can’t say anything without immediately following up with “I’m just kidding” to cover your ass, just in case.
And you can’t be #sincere with people because every time you want to get real, they're just like:
You can’t have a normal conversation without getting in a few zingers. It’s what you do best.
And you definitely can't have an argument or fight with someone without whipping out your sarcasm. It’s your not-so-secret weapon.
You can’t turn off or control your sarcasm, even when your friends need you to be serious for a sec...
...or when someone says something stupid. You can’t resist the urge to eviscerate them.
You cannot and will not let someone outwit you.
Which means you can’t let someone get the last word. Nope. Not happening. Ever. Ever.
You can’t deny that you’ve vowed — to your friends, to yourself — to work on your sarcasm.
But you also can’t deny that although it gets you into trouble, your sarcasm is one of the best things about you. And it’s here to stay.