1.
2020: Superbowl LIV 2021: Superbowl LAUGH 2022: Superbowl LOVE
2.
When I randomly remember one of my shirts I haven’t seen in a while https://t.co/yFdsEb4fud
3.
how come u need 3 references? just trust me
4.
god watching me take a nap at 10 am
5.
if i ever tweet something that i’ve already tweeted before then don’t say anything i have like 5 thoughts in total and all they do is rotate
6.
"I know you from Twitter" - Embarrassing for everyone involved - Humiliating - Too online "Your reputation precedes you" - Cool and scary - Mysterious - Potentially ominous - Old-timey villian
7.
who the fuck brings a lemur to t.g.i. friday’s
8.
So my dumbass cancelled my credit card bc I saw someone was using it in Europe but I am in Europe and I am the one using it
9.
I don't make the rules sorry
10.
finally my story will be told
11.
my sister is 25 years old and has celebrated her birthday on June 30th, why did she just find her birth certificate and it say July 16th lmaoooooooooooo
12.
dear delaware,
13.
i miss the old days back in 1992 when i didn’t exist
14.
when it was your friend’s birthday and they chose you to help them hand out the cupcakes in class
15.
me thinking of ways to stick to my budget while drinking $8 iced coffee
16.
I don't care that Shakira didn't pay her taxes! Jeff Bezos doesn't either and he didn't release She Wolf
17.
“Told yo stupid ass not to spend anymore money now look at you... broke as fuck” https://t.co/xEn0r6oRKN