If “Friends” Had Been Set In 2015

“The one where Ross gets a flat-pack sofa from Ikea so doesn’t need to pivot.”

Warner Bros.

1. The one where Joey discovers Tinder.

2. The one where Joey finds Phoebe on Tinder and they finally stop dancing around the subject and hook up.

3. The one where Central Perk becomes a juice bar.

4. The one where everyone deletes Rachel on Facebook for uploading too many baby pictures.

5. The one where Ross’ terrible spray tan goes viral.

6. The one where Monica gets angry at a bad Yelp review.

7. The one where “Smelly Cat” becomes a YouTube sensation.

8. The one where getting a plane evacuated causes Rachel to be questioned by Homeland Security for three days.

9. The one where Ross doesn’t go to the wrong airport because he checked it on his phone.

10. The one where Chandler takes a cheeky selfie when he’s stuck in the ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre.

11. The one where Ross freaks out because Rachel accepted Mark’s friend request.

12. The one with the flashbacks inspired by someone looking at Timehop.

13. The one where everyone gets pissed off at Chandler for spending too much time telling jokes on Twitter.

14. The one where Ross accuses Chandler of stealing his jokes on Twitter.

15. The one where Joey goes on Dancing With the Stars.

16. The one where Chandler finds out about Monica’s wedding Pinterest board before they get engaged and freaks out.

17. The one where Chandler isn’t really freaked out and plans the wedding of Monica’s dreams (according to her Pinterest board).

18. The one where Phoebe’s Etsy store selling her homemade sock bunnies doesn’t really take off.

19. The one where Ben gets taken into care after Joey and Chandler leave him on the bus.

20. The one with the prom video that got put online and written about by BuzzFeed because it was kind of heartbreaking but very cute.

21. The one with the @UglyNakedGuy parody Twitter account.

22. The one where Ross and the girl from Poughkeepsie have a long-distance relationship over Skype.

23. The one with the free porn, but no one cares because there’s endless free porn online.

24. The one in London where they all get screwed over by data roaming charges.

25. The one with the Instagram of Joey and Fergie.

26. The one where no one is surprised that Brad Pitt’s character has lost loads of weight because they’ve seen it on Facebook.

27. The one where Ross orders a flat-pack sofa from Ikea so doesn’t need to pivot.

28. The one where they live tweet themselves throwing a ball around all day with the hashtag #BallThrowingThursday.

29. The one where Rachel makes the trifle correctly because the pages don’t get stuck together on an iPad.

30. The one where Joey puts his Kindle in the freezer.

31. The one where Phoebe finds Frank Jr. on a genealogy website.

32. The one where they find out that Janice has become the seventh biggest YouTube vlogger on the planet.

33. The one where Phoebe talks a toner salesman out of suicide via Gchat.

34. The one where Monica and Chandler’s engagement picture gets photoshopped.

35. The one where Ross doesn’t freak out about sending a holiday card with Mona because who the hell actually sends holiday cards in 2015?!

36. The one where Phoebe finds out about Ursula’s porn career through a basic Google search.

37. The one where someone posts Ross’ sandwich note on Imgur.

38. The one where Rachel smokes e-cigarettes.

39. The one with Ross’ wedding which no one attends because they all just watch via webcam.

40. The one where Chandler works on his personal brand.

41. The one where Joey gets a job at the Genius Bar.

42. The one where Days of Our Lives becomes available on Netflix.

43. The one with the selfie stick.

44. The one with Joey’s sex tape.

45. The one where Ross moderates the r/dinosaurs sub-Reddit.

46. The one where Ross asks Quora how to get leather trousers back on.

47. The one with the lesbian wedding that’s fully recognised under the law.

48. The one where they all move to Brooklyn.

49. The one where Monica opens an artisanal mayonnaise shop in Fort Greene.

50. The one where Chandler grows a moustache – not to impress Richard, but because it’s Movember.

51. The one where Joey finds Rachel’s copy of Fifty Shades of Grey.

52. The one where no one can stop listening to 1989.

53. The one where Janice uses Google Maps and finds that 15 Yemen Road, Yemen is not a real place.

54. The one where Rachel names her baby Daenerys.

55. The one with the evictions because they clearly couldn’t afford the rent on their salaries.

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Robin Edds is editor-at-large at BuzzFeed UK and is based in London.
 
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