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25 Things That Only Happen At Oceana

*Loses mates, gets off with a Smurf*

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1. You always psych yourself up for a big night at Oceana.


2. But then you get in and you're like: "Holy shit there are a fuckload of people in here".

4. And attempting to find eachother never really works out.

You're such a pest @BenJefferyJ go away #benproblems #oceanaproblems

5. Because to avoid queuing again, you bought drinks in bulk.

8. So you seek solace in the WKDs that are on special offer.

9. And now, because you're absolutely buzzing on artificial colours, you decide to make new mates.

I spent my 5 minutes in oceana meeting some new mates

10. New mates who will no doubt end up on a keyring you purchased because you wanted to commemorate your new friendship.

12. So you end up getting off with a Smurf in the smoking area, because that's where all Oceana romances starts.

Sexiest smurf you will ever see !! #Blue #Oceana

13. But then you bump into your mates, because it's also a Lost and Found for humans.

When you lose your mates in Oceana and then find them in the smoking area

15. Because Oceana is just massive in every way.

17. But then after a while, once the night sinks in, you realise it may just be the worst.

If anyone has seen my dignity could you please return it , I think it's somewhere in the disco room in Oceana

19. And then stacked it in front of everyone.

completely forgot I absolutely stacked it face first in Oceana last night. #CaptainSmooth


20. Even at the end of the night, you still have to go to the cash machine and get ripped off.

23. And they sell hotdogs in Oceana because it is a wonderful place where all your dreams come true.

24. And even when your memory is a little hazy the next day, there will always be that lovely little reminder imprinted on your wrist.

25. That and smurf stains 😍😍😍.