1.
Me, as a ghost: GET OUT homeowners: grab the dog let's get out of here! Me: LEAVE THE DOG WHO'S A GOOD BOY WHO'S A GOOD BOY THAT'S RIGHT U R
2.
Friend: You going out tonight? Me: No Friend: What are you gonna do? Me: I'm having some friends over for dinner
3.
In 34 years I've said I love you to two women and every dog I've ever seen.
4.
You can't tell me what to do, you're not my dog
5.
My life is a constant battle of wanting to pet a dog and not wanting to talk to its owner.
6.
No you can't sit there my dog might sit there.
7.
[bends down to pet your dog] Me: what's this guys name Owner: this is- Me [not breaking eye contact with dog]: yeah I wasn't talking to you
8.
Why is our dog walker acting like she's in an intimate relationship with our dog just because we no longer need her
9.
Thinking about quitting my job to spend more time with the dog
10.
[First date] Her: I'm really glad you asked me out yesterday in the park Me: *looking under table* you didn't bring your dog?
11.
u know what i like about people? their dogs.
12.
nice dog. Sure would be a shame if someone were to...pet it for like 40 minutes
13.
Cop: Do you know why I've pulled you over? Me: *rolls eyes* yes.. Cop: *finishes petting my puppy through the window* ok that'll be all sir
14.
15.
Cool date idea: Bring your dog to my house..then leave
16.
A strip club, but instead of women taking their clothes off it's just dogs and instead of lap dances you can just pet the dogs.
17.
When you're at a party and the dog comes downstairs
18.
[1st date] Maybe next time i could meet your dog [2nd date] Your dog is so cool [3rd date] Do u mind if me & your dog hung out without you
19.
Friendship requirements: be fun-loving, low maintenance, cute, furry, four-legged, a dog.
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