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23 Everyday Objects That Want You Dead

I'd go check on your kitchen mop if I were you.

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1. This raging pepper is ready to take a bite out of you.

Via imgur.com

2. This seething roof is waiting for the right time.

Via imgur.com

3. This pair of shoes is conjuring up an evil, evil plan.

4. And these boxes are already plotting your very nasty downfall.

Via imgur.com

5. This spilt tea is letting you know that next time it'll be you on the floor.

6. And this onion is dead set on making you cry.

7. This icecream is going to make sure you're the one that screams.

8. And this mop is going to wipe the floor with your ass.

9. This chocolate cake is most definitely Devil's Food.

10. And this pickle wants to put you in a pickle.

11. This Samurai leaf will make sure you don't make it past Autumn.

Via imgur.com

12. And this beer ghoul will probably possess you.

13. These eggs are ready to get cracking on your demise.

14. And this popcorn wants to make you the star of your own real-life horror film.

15. This BBQ is gonna make sure you go down in flames.

When it get's a little warmer, obvs.
Via funnyjunk.com

When it get's a little warmer, obvs.

16. And this potato is gonna mash the shit out of you.

17. This bag is going to stuff you and tie you up.

Via imgur.com

18. Then this kayak is going to let you sleep with the fishes.

Via imgur.com

19. This blanket is gonna smother you while you watch Netflix.

@FacesPics / Via imgur.com

20. And this pasta is going to make sure it's you who lands in hot water.

21. This car is going to drive you to destruction.

22. And this cookie is gonna show you who the real monster is.

23. BUT WORST OF ALL THIS CHOCOLATE MILK IS GONNA MAKE YOU NOT WANT CHOCOLATE MILK ANYMORE.