1. You spend a ridiculous amount of time engaging in "online" staring contests.
2. The "last seen" timestamp has like, actually ENDED relationships.
3. But removing "last seen" means you can't see anyone else's "last seen".
4. The two tick verification only added to your mounting paranoia, but there was always that glimmer of hope.
5. Until they decided to turn them FUCKING BLUE AND KILL ALL OF YOUR HOPES AND DREAMS.
6. You now know with certainty, when you're being ignored.
7. Which means people now know when you're ignoring them.
8. And you tend to ignore people because their messages are usually LAME AS FUCK.
9. Your phone's photo gallery is now a collection of your mate's Tinder matches.
11. As well as some other weird, weird shit you wouldn't otherwise have on your phone.
No need for protein shakes, just eat vagina.
12. There's always someone spamming you with a running commentary of their day.