1. Ugh, I don't want to go to the gym.
2. I'm just so tired.
3. Even though all I've done is sit in this chair for 8 hours and eat cookies at two hour intervals.
4. Shout out to last night's existential crisis for making me sign up to a class I've never done before.
5. I don't think I've ever felt so determined in my whole entire life.
6. Yet now I cannot think of anything worse than sweating my arse off in this stupid spin class.
7. What on earth made me think I would maintain any sense of motivation for more than 12 hours?
8. I think I'm feeling a bit unwell.
9. You shouldn't exercise if you're feeling unwell, it's a thing.
10. Or hungry.
11. God I am so hungry.
12. Or am I ill?</b>
13. Either way, I shouldn't go.
14. Although exercise apparently makes you feel better.
15. I've never exercised and then felt terrible.
16. Whereas if I don't go, I'm guaranteed to feel disappointed in myself.
17. Disappointed while I eat a massive bowl of creamy pasta.
18. Mmmm pasta.
19. If I go to the gym, then I would have earned a big bowl of pasta.
20. But then is there any point going to the gym if I'm just gonna waste it all on pasta?
21. This is why these decisions really need to be thought through properly, going to the gym could actually be a big waste of time.
22. Time better spent watching Ru Paul.
23. I know, I'll ask someone else what they think. Get some impartial advice.
24. Gena — should I go to the gym?
25. Yes?
26. Ok well that wasn't the answer I wanted.
27. Let me ask someone else.
28. Ben — should I go to the gym?
29. No?
30. Ok but he is also going home to eat pastries so I don't know if I should trust him.
31. Maybe I should ask a third person, just to be sure.
32. Jasmin — should I go to the gym?
33. I should do whatever I want to do?
34. WELL THAT'S EXACTLY MY PROBLEM JASMIN I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO.
35. OK now I'm back to square one.
36. I shouldn't overthink this, I should just change and go.
37. Go right now.
38. Riiiiiighhhhtt now.
39. My body does not seem to be moving.
40. Maybe this is a sign.
41. Maybe I am ill.
42. OK so I won't go.
43. But I'll definitely go tomorrow.