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    20 Truly Horrifying Vintage Holiday Recipes

    "Oh, bring us a figgy pudding"... with Jell-O, tuna, and mayo.

    1. The Shrimp Christmas Tree

    Spanish Green Olive Commission / Via bonappetit.com

    Woof.

    2. The Christmas Candle Salad

    Tested Recipe Institute, Inc. / Via vintagerecipecards.com

    Bananas, cranberry Jell-O... seems harmless, until you realize the "melted wax" is actually mayo.

    3. The Deviled Ham Sandwich Tree

    vintage-ads.livejournal.com

    The star topper is intended to distract from the pile of ham, olives, white bread, and sour cream.

    4. The Tuna Christmas Tree

    badanduglyofretrofood.com

    Not surprised Elf on the Shelf is the one behind this, tbh.

    5. This Hot Creamed Diced Ham, Oyster, and Mushroom Dish

    badanduglyofretrofood.com

    It's like a fondue of garbage.

    6. The Frozen Fruitcake Salad

    Better Homes and Gardens / Via vintagerecipecards.com

    Fine, if you're into mixing sour cream and Cool Whip together.

    7. The Holiday Vegetable Loaf

    8. Molded Pâté-Cheese Balls

    Rachel W. Miller for BuzzFeed / Via Good Housekeeping's Complete Christmas Cookbook, 1967

    Because nothing says "let's get this party started!" like liver and cream cheese balls suspended in a meaty gelatin.

    9. The Glazed Potato Ring

    bonappetit.com

    I actually didn't know it was possible to make potatoes look unappealing.

    10. The Cranberry "Candles"

    autostraddle.com

    Just cranberry sauce, gelatin, mayo, and an open flame.

    11. The Vegetable and Tuna Jell-O Wreath

    Jell-O/General Foods / Via tiddleywink.com

    I repeat: VEGETABLE AND TUNA JELL-O WREATH.

    12. This Duck Mousse En Gelée

    bonappetit.com

    More meat products floating in beefy Jell-O.

    13. This Crime Against Leftovers

    14. The Flaky Christmas Tree

    badanduglyofretrofood.com

    Happy Holidays! I glued some green corn flakes to a board for you!

    15. Hot Dr. Pepper

    retronaut.com

    can u not?

    16. The Ham Chaud-Froid

    Rachel W. Miller for BuzzFeed / Via Good Housekeeping's Complete Christmas Cookbook, 1967

    "Chaud-froid" is French for "ham holding a bunch of 'ham mousse cornucopias' and surrounded by a base of sherry Jell-O." Just FYI.

    17. This Decorated Baked Ham

    General Foods Kitchens Cookbook / Via turkeysandwich.wordpress.com

    Nope.

    18. The Noel Glazed Ham

    Family Circle Magazine / Via tiddleywink.com

    Clearly, decorated ham was A Thing.

    19. The Christmas "Pudding"

    badanduglyofretrofood.com

    Sour cream, pasta, raisins, and cheese, huh? That's the way you want to go?

    20. A Meat Star

    turkeysandwich.wordpress.com

    Do it for Baby Jesus.

    Have you tossed your sugar cookies yet?

    AMC / Via giphy.com