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128 Things That Aren't Penises At All

The longest list of things that ARE NOT penises that you will see today.

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1. This leaning tower:

FishermansDick / Via reddit.com

2. This cutout:

Omsk_Camill / Via reddit.com

3. This short blanket:

verious_ / Via reddit.com

4. This headphone loop:

5. This stalactite:

bokismokitoki / Via reddit.com

6. This tile:

ccfoo242 / Via reddit.com

7. This horn:

Marillenknoedel / Via pr0gramm.com

8. This glob of toothpaste:

iliveinmymind / Via reddit.com

9. This snowblower:

kisforkate

10. These long faces:

11. This stance:

jabbathechav / Via reddit.com

12. These awesome hubcaps:

TrollErgoSum / Via reddit.com

13. Pretty much everything in this pic:

mycology / Via reddit.com

14. Meowth's finger:

Tysche / Via reddit.com

15. These tracks:

JeanLucPicard / Via imgur.com

16. The extra growth on this carrot:

knoffs / Via pr0gramm.com

17. This tandem pose:

18. This floppy ear:

MyAnacondaDoess / Via reddit.com

19. These lockers:

electrocabbage / Via reddit.com

20. This dog's back:

r3fined / Via reddit.com

21. This crystal:

22. This guy's thumb:

23. This nasty cut:

Rethras / Via reddit.com

24. These candleholders:

25. The grip on this wine label:

Rorschach_on_ur_face / Via reddit.com

26. This lil' tuber:

falky / Via pr0gramm.com

27. This mortar and pestle:

28. This science experiment:

apoeticturtle / Via reddit.com

29. This sausage:

30. This ultrasound:

codythomashunsberger / Via reddit.com

31. This shadow:

Lukeme9X / Via reddit.com

32. This lasting impression:

nymphkitty / Via reddit.com

33. This informational sign:

fox93hunter / Via reddit.com

34. This holy cucumber:

SurlyTurkey / Via reddit.com

35. This hearty meal:

themeggg / Via reddit.com

36. This guy keeping cool in the pool:

fulcrumbs / Via imgur.com

37. This warm pillow:

38. This slab of meat:

elrangarino / Via reddit.com

39. This outgrowth:

40. This nimble gymnast's pose:

41. This sack of birdseed:

42. This pulpy german orange juice:

43. This group photo:

shaqfan99 / Via reddit.com

44. This pressed meat:

45. This hammer and anvil:

46. This Black Forest specialty:

vladrichdemaclant / Via imgur.com

47. These balloons:

pund3r / Via reddit.com

48. This fine art:

49. This tasty chocolate:

50. This beautiful angel:

51. This scene from Stranger Things:

BurnoutByNight / Via reddit.com

52. This root:

Moefassa / Via imgur.com

53. This swarm of birds:

catsandboobies / Via reddit.com

54. This hat:

43mepiace / Via reddit.com

55. This toy:

56. This ring display:

Egotistical / Via reddit.com

57. Langeoog Island:

58. This Beats display:

oliver_friends / Via reddit.com

59. This bread:

60. This cold-cut imprint:

61. This little piece of fruit:

EvoLutionz / Via pr0gramm.com

62. This tater:

IdonotknowwhatthehellIamdoinghere / Via imgur.com

63. This cactus:

SL4V3R / Via pr0gramm.com

64. This bubble:

TheSoundOfRainNeedsNoTranslation / Via imgur.com

65. This coloring book picture:

66. This turnip:

Ablativus / Via pr0gramm.com

67. This chocolate-dipped cone:

Katzenkran / Via pr0gramm.com

68. This hot rooster:

TheDNote / Via reddit.com

69. This floor plan:

70. This broken egg:

SexySmileyQueen / Via reddit.com

71. This flower:

72. This cat's cast:

73. This vegetable:

GMarcelrene / Via imgur.com

74. This happy plant:

vegansaul / Via reddit.com

75. This kid's towel:

76. This backrest:

CapnCrunk666 / Via reddit.com

77. This perfectly shattered phone:

Laureltess / Via reddit.com

78. This umbrella and contrail:

rephan / Via reddit.com

79. This furball:

lilianatex / Via reddit.com

80. This prickly plant:

whimywamwamwozzle / Via reddit.com

81. This weightlifting bench:

UnfinishedProjects / Via reddit.com

82. This emerging fruit:

stationcommando / Via reddit.com

83. This carrot:

84. This innocent puppy:

i124qnds / Via reddit.com

85. These slices of bacon:

86. This pointy fence:

ppaed / Via reddit.com

87. These hot sausages:

88. This dandelion:

moncure / Via reddit.com

89. This delivery service:

TheCocktopuss / Via reddit.com

90. This part of Europe:

91. This logo:

Shnazzyone / Via reddit.com

92. This art at Jade Bay:

93. This squirrel with a croissant:

94. This popsicle:

95. ...from any angle:

96. The Holy Mother:

wouislouters / Via reddit.com

97. This well-rubbed piece of meat:

RompeChocha / Via reddit.com

98. Squidward's nose:

Nickelodeon

99. This lil' carrot:

tyk982 / Via imgur.com

100. This side dish:

101. This long shadow:

102. This man and his big wheels of cheese:

103. This pear with a stem:

104. This hanging chandelier:

105. This bald head under a hat:

106. These bales of hay:

107. These lights:

108. This trendy veggie:

tomtech8 / Via imgur.com

109. This German lint remover:

110. This lovely canyon:

slimvictor / Via imgur.com

111. These four letters:

112. This claymation ice cream:

Aardman / Via Twitter: @VeryHeavyUncle

113. This air pressure gauge:

Schoppe / Via pr0gramm.com

114. This monkey tail:

115. This cloud pattern:

116. Spider-Man's air nozzle:

117. These bicycle racks:

118. This pepper grinder:

119. This door knocker:

120. These bannisters:

121. These weather-worn rocks:

122. This delicious fruit juice:

123. This fountain:

124. This hook:

125. This baby panda:

126. This dinosaur head:

127. This picture from a children's book:

128. And the audio track of Modern Talking's "You're My Heart, You're My Soul":

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