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    Sep 30, 2018

    18 Tweets That Will Crack Up Anyone With A Dirty Mind

    "If there's a sock on my doorknob it means I'm having sex with the other one."

    1.

    When y’all been kissing for an hour and she tells you to lock the door https://t.co/QTwgHwMAF5

    2.

    If there's a sock on my doorknob it means I'm having sex with the other one.

    3.

    Sex before work have you walking around feeling like the manager

    4.

    Aye these tortillas better chill. 🤕

    5.

    If women knew how hard it was to shave testicles maybe they'd give us a break

    6.

    Testicles: it's too hot inside ur body 😩😩 if we can't regulate our temperature we can't work 🙅🙅 so we have to dangle here all exposed 🙃🙃 Ovaries: https://t.co/oDwgqNDinb

    7.

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    My parents are celebrating their thirty year anniversary today ❤️ Here’s a picture of them on their first date 😍

    9.

    When you on the first date and she says “lets go back to my place”

    10.

    When you slobbin on his knob like corn on the cob and you look down at his balls

    11.

    12.

    Me: *rubs her thigh* Her: *gets up and lock the door* Me:

    13.

    When you slept through the "you up" text at 2am and randomly wake up at 4 am to see it and call with hope

    14.

    We sucking dick in the middle of arguments ladies. Con. Fuse. Him.

    15.

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    17.

    When your girl sends you nudes without asking

    18.

    Day 342 without sex: I accidentally told the In-N-Out worker I wanted doggy-style fries instead of animal-style fries.