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20 Questions Atheists Are Too Polite To Ask In Public

We may be vocal on Reddit and Youtube, but in real life we're actually quite non-confrontational. Be glad you'll never hear these questions in person.

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1. So how did everyone outside your religion end up believing in the wrong god?

2. Tithing and a tax-exempt status? Those pastors must be making bank, right?

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So much for that camel going through an eye of a needle

3. Is that mixed cloths I see you wearing?

4. Isn't it cheating for a Christian Scientist to be wearing glasses?

5. Wait- you mean the communion and wine AREN’T metaphors?!

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Y'all is nasty..

6. Do you want to see this picture of the Prophet I drew?

7. So which version of the Bible in English do you use as the inerrant word of your god?

8. How many wives does your religion let you have?

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Just one?

9. Do you teach your kids about Santa Claus as practice?

10. Is Jesus the same race as his dad?

11. Aren't you hot all the time?

12. Why don’t you have any slaves?

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Oh so NOW it's wrong?

13. But what if Jehovah needed a blood transfusion?

14. So if Muhammad, Jesus, Buddha, Vishnu, Thor, and Poseidon all got in a fight, who would win?

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Better yet, if they wrestled in a kiddie pool filled with Jello…

15. Sorry, which hand sign goes with your religion again?

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Concentration *clap clap clap* sixty-four *clap clap clap*

16. Would a Republican’s prayers and a Democrat’s prayers cancel each other out?

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Or Tim Tebow prayers versus Tom Brady prayers..

17. If my Thetan levels are high enough, does that mean I get to meet Xenu?

18. If your god is omnipotent, can’t he just give me irrefutable evidence of his existence?

19. What’s Satan up to these days?

20. Have you heard the good news of the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

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