18 Things That Are Way Too Real For People Who Stay Up Late

Why be an early bird when you can be a night owl?

1. You know that you’ll tell yourself that tonight is the night that you’ll go to bed early…

BuzzFeed Yellow / Via youtube.com

…except going to bed early just isn’t a realistic option.


Forcing your eyes closed isn’t sleep.

2. If you make an actual attempt, you’ll just end up tossing and turning until you say “fuck it” and give up.


10 p.m. is early.

3. You know that every minute counts when setting your 4,000 alarms.

You might still sleep through them.

4. And that each night consists of counting to see how many hours of sleep you’ll actually get.

“If I go to bed in the next half hour and wake up at 7 a.m., then maybe I can get a good three hours in.”

5. You know that the night transforms you into a creative genius…

Can’t sleep? Write an entire novel.

6. …while the day forces you to become a sleepy sloth.

The day wasn’t made for living.

7. You can basically name just about every late-night coffee shop, restaurant, and store within a 10-mile radius of you.

freshhhproduce / Via instagram.com

They understand you on a spiritual level.

8. Which is helpful since your appetite also awakens at night.

There’s dinner, and then there’s second and third dinner.

9. You know that putting your phone down while in bed is nearly impossible.

“Maybe I just need to go back four months in my Twitter feed.”

10. And that you always forget that your friends are asleep when you text them at 3 a.m.

Kirsten King / BuzzFeed

If you find a fellow night owl, never let go.

11. You know that counting sheep is bullshit.


What’s so great about sheep?

12. And that you’d rather count how many episodes of a show you’ve gone through in one night.


Now that’s a true accomplishment!

13. When you decide to finally fall asleep, you always try to beat the sun…


Ha. Ha. Ha.

14. …but then end up disappointed and realize that you’ve fucked up big-time.

15. Your 4,000 alarms will go off after what FEELS like five minutes of sleep.



16. And you’ll crawl toward your gallon of coffee just to keep you afloat.


Caffeine is there for you when no one else is.

17. Your friends and family will always ask you how you even function this way.



18. And even though you don’t know the answer, you get by anyway because you enjoy being a creature of the night.


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