Buzz·Posted on 22 Mar 201621 Questions Glasgow Has For The Rest Of The WorldYe dinnae understand us? Och, gie's peace. That's pure mince.by Nina GlencrossBuzzFeed ContributorFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink 1. Why do ice cream vans in other cities only sell ice cream? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @miketurner93 / Via instagram.com Where else are you going to get your glass bottle of Tizer and packet of Mayfair Lights at 9pm on a Baltic Tuesday night? The shops? Naw, mate. 2. Why aren't all sausages square? Instagram: @trowty Bratwurst is all well and good, but Lorne sausage is truly delicious. Take a hammer to some sausage meat, fry it, then get back to us. 3. And FFS, where are all the tattie scones? Instagram: @mangogreene Americans, you can keep your pancakes and hash browns. We've got tattie scones, which are basically a sublime cross between the two. 4. Why do you pretend you can't understand us? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @the.sturgy Och, gie's peace, that's pure mince! Yeez are aw talkin' pish. 5. Yet you simultaneously think we have the sexiest accent. How does that work? Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF ITV / Via imgur.com Us: "Goat ae time oan ye, pal?"You: "I have no idea what you just said but take me now." 6. Why do you have so many different names for the slice on the end of a loaf, and why are they all wrong? Instagram: @erinviversfergusonmusic Let's settle this once and for all. It's not the crust, heel, or end slice. It's the outsider. 7. Why are other cities' subway systems so bloody complicated? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @laviedeaaron It doesn't get any simpler than the trusty Clockwork Orange. 8. Why don't you take full advantage of "taps aff" weather? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @kendobain13 Anything over 10°C is considered summer in Glasgow, so why the fuck are folk in Spain, Portugal, and Italy stoating about in coats? 9. And why does everyone flee at the first sign of rain? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @micawyse / Via imgur.com You know it's just a wee bit of water, right? It never stops us having a nice day out. 10. Why do people in other cities take themselves so seriously? Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Giphy / Channel 4 We're witty, we're aware of our flaws, and we're absolutely great at taking the piss out of ourselves, unlike *cough* Londoners. 11. Why are you so bad at flirting? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @clairebarclaydraws Maybe it's our charm and unparalleled wit, but all we need to ask is "are ye dancin'?" Next thing we know, we're married with three weans. 12. How can so many of you go out and enjoy yourself without getting totes steamboats? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @solis_aeterni You can keep your continental café culture and dinky glasses of wine, thanks: Getting "mad wae it" is definitely a prerequisite of having a good time. 13. Why is everyone else in the world so rubbish at gigs? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @gingo67 There's a reason so many international bands believe we're the best crowd in the world. Four words: Here we fucking go. 14. Why are non-Glaswegians so shite at swearing? Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Giphy / THINKfilm Come on tae fuck, guys. Why not throw in the odd "bawjaws" or "fanny features" every once in a while? 15. While we're on the subject: Why don't you use insults as terms of endearment? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @kayleymac Forget "bae": "I pure love you, ya bawbag" sounds much more sincere. 16. And why are your comebacks rotten too? Instagram: @xlittlebug Look, all you need to say to instantly win any argument is a simple "yer maw". 17. Why do you think Edinburgh is better? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @valerianesevrain Aye, they've got gorgeous architecture and a castle perched on a fucking volcano but come on, we've got, em, Leo the Silent Raver. Nae contest. 18. What's with the unprecedented lack of Irn-Bru? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @samdunscombe And how do people in other counties cure their hangovers without this ginger nectar? Seriously, guys, you don't know what you're missing. Get it sorted. 19. And why isn't the mighty Munchy Box available worldwide? Instagram: @starryyxeyed They may drastically diminish your lifespan but you really haven't lived until you've had one of these bad boys after a night out on the randan. 20. Why don't people in other cities decorate their historical statues with traffic cones? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @tattoo9999uk What's wrong with you all? 21. And, most importantly, why would you want to live anywhere else but here? View this photo on Instagram Instagram: @kenye_east The evidence is clear to see, so you might as well admit it: Glasgow's miles better.