26 Signs You’re An Aussie Country Kid

An endless supply of Woodstock bourbon, B&S balls, and Todd Carney. Country Australia has it all.

1. You’ve spent way too much money at this shop, whether you want to admit it or not.

2. This has been your choice of shoe since 2005.

3. You know at least 20 people who own this hat.

4. You know that this war is tearing your community apart.

5. At your first parties this was your drink of choice.

6. And when you got older you slowly transitioned to this.

7. Channel 7 and Nine? Pffffttt. You know Prime and Win is where it’s at!

8. You know how rebellious you felt when you stayed up last Prime Possum’s bed time.

9. You’re used to this every morning.

I know what you’re going to say, “hey that can be anywhere!” Nope! Go out the country Australia and deal with that winter.

10. But don’t get us started on how tough your summer is, Sydney.

11. This has been your car at one stage in your life.

12. You still call Pay-TV Austar.

Even if it’s officially called Foxtel now.

13. You know that Bliss N Eso are kings in the country. Period.

They constantly go out of their way to put on shows in the country, and for that Bliss N Eso, we thank you.

14. You’ve been to a few B&S balls in your day.

For you city folk a B&S (Bachelor and Spinster ball) is basically where you go to meet people of the opposite gender, and that’s putting it lightly.

15. You have no idea what the fuck happened to the word “swag.”

16. THIS IS A SWAG! And you love it dearly.

17. You know all the stories and folklore to scare the crap out of people visiting

From the Pilliga Princess to the Min Min lights. City folk visiting are not going to be able to sleep for days.

18. You do not know anyone who has ever voted for this party.

19. But you know a scary amount of people voted for this party

20. You lose half your friends in high school because they get sent to boarding school in the city.

21. You know how broke you get come festival season.

First we need to drive to our nearest capital city, fork out for accommodation, and then pay for an already overpriced festival ticket. Not to mention going on a shopping spree at City Beach while we are in the city.

22. You know that you don’t need a beach. The river is where it’s at!

23. No seriously, who needs a beach?

24. Your passionate hate for the city comes to a peak during the annual City vs Country rugby league game.

Fun fact: Todd Carney is from the country.

25. You know that massive bull-bars and unnecessary ariels on utes is the norm.

26. And You instantly know who else is from the country when you’re away from home and you instantly gravitate to them.

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