26 Stages Of Having An Absolute Ripper Of A Wank On Valentine's Day
Happy Valentine's Day, hand.
Once again, that horrible time of year has snuck up on you: Valentine’s Day.
And there's no one to share it with.
It doesn't help that every couple is way more affectionate during this time.
And they ask you if you're ok.
You then realise how you're going to spend your night...
You inform your roommates not to come into your room...
When they ask you what for, you do the super secret signal, that only men will understand.
You get the necessities.
And... some other stuff if you want to spoil yourself.
You go to your favourite website...
WHO NEEDS RELATIONSHIPS?!
WHO NEEDS COMMITMENT?!
Obviously your roommate didn't listen and they walk in and you're just like:
Once they leave, you get back to it!
And before you know it...
It is over.
Best 30 seconds ever!
Immediately after, you think to yourself:
And what you were looking at suddenly isn't as hot.
You leave your room and your roommates look at you in shame.
But that's all good, because of the amount of money you saved by staying in.
Remember, there's always next year.
Until then... happy Valentine's Day, hand.
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