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21 Things You Should Never Say To An Atheist

Warning: You're going to hell just for reading this.

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1. "How can atheists even have morals?"

Showtime / Via

Because if you need God to stop you from murdering someone, then you have a SERIOUS problem.

2. "Why do atheists always think they are smarter than everyone?"

The 700 Club/Pat Robertson / Via

It's a little hard not to when you have to deal with people like this.

3. "If humans are descended from apes how come there are still apes?"

Disney / Via

If white Americans descended from Europeans how come there are still Europeans? Plus, humans didn't evolve from modern chimps but we did share a common ancestor around 13 million years ago.

4. "There's no such thing as a black atheist."

BigThink / Via

Yeah. Some people would disagree with that.

5. "Where did the universe come from, if God didn't do it?"

AMC / Via

It's tough to explain quantum vacuum fluctuations and the big bang to uncle at Christmas dinner.

6. "Are you a communist?"

Disney / Via

Maybe. Why does it matter? Atheists come from all political backgrounds.

7. "How can you believe in aliens but not God?"

Disney / Via

Again, not all atheists hold the same views. There are atheists that don't believe in aliens too. But it isn't that much of a stretch to think that life may have evolved somewhere else if there's another planet out there that's hospitable to life.

8. "Atheists are so ANGRY all the time."

FX / Via

We're very nice.

9. "But...bananas perfectly fit the human hand, so that means they were designed by an intelligent creator."

Parks and Recreation

What about POMEGRANATES? Now those are a bitch to peel. But I guess that's why they were made by Hades.

10. "Why do you believe EVERYTHING that scientists say?"

Bill Nye / Via

No, we don't believe everything that scientists say, but we do look at their evidence. Scientists are disproving scientists all the time. That's the beauty of science.

11. "Why do you celebrate Christmas?"

Rihanna / Via

Because getting presents and a day off from work or school is fun?

12. "Don't you want to believe....just in case?"

HBO / Via

Not really.

13. "Why do you hate Jesus?"

giphy / Via

I'm sure Jesus was a cool dude if he existed.

14. "But the sunset is so beautiful that somebody had to have created it."

FOX / Via

You mean....physics?

15. "Atheists also have faith because they don't know what REALLY happened."

Beyonce / Via

Atheism is clearly defined as a "lack of faith."

16. "Do you ACTUALLY believe we evolved from monkeys?"

Fox / Via

Do you actually believe we came from a magic rib?

17. "One word: NAZIS"

Disney / Via

What does this even have to do with anything?

18. "Hitler was an atheist."

Universal Pictures / Via

Actually he was a Christian. But his "faith" had nothing to do with his atrocities anyways.

19. "STALIN."

James Franco / Via

Because every atheist is Stalin.

20. "MAO ZEDONG!!!"

ABC / Via

.....wasn't a good guy. And your point is?

21. "Have you heard of this guy called...Jesus?"

Giphy / Via

No, we haven't heard of the most famous person/character in all of human history. For the record, John Lennon was totally WRONG. The Beatles were never more popular than Jesus. Nobody could beat JC's infamy and badassery.

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