1. Employees must be over the age of 58:
2. Employees must commit their lives to this job:
3. Employees must not make mistakes:
4. Employees must give their tips to their bosses:
5.
Employees must have extensive experience for this entry-level job:
6. Employees must come back to work after a work injury and def not get any workers' comp:
7.
Employees must work for free:
8. Employees must be OK with getting all their personal stuff moved around:
9. Employees must be Christian:
10. Employees must do tons of tasks five minutes before leaving:
11. Employees must stay in constant contact, even on the weekend:
12. Employees must not ask about salary while applying, even if it's not posted:
13. Employees must sacrifice their well-being for this job:
14. Employees must apply without knowing salary range ahead of time:
15. Employees must put their aprons on on their own time, not while they're on the clock:
16. Employees must be willing to lie to their coworkers:
17. Employees must always be early, because being on time is actually being late:
18.
Employees must know when to come in to work, even when there's no schedule provided:
19. Employees must follow this rule, which is illegal to enforce:
20.
Employees must be OK with being asked extremely personal questions:
21.
Employees must not have cellphones, even in cases of emergencies:
22. Employees must not be a "snowflake":
23. Employees must have extensive knowledge of metaphors for this senior graphic design position:
24. Employees must NEVER sit:
25. Employees must be able to withstand extreme heat:
26. Employees must pay the company, not the other way around:
27.
And finally, employees must not use the word "Hey":
