Have you fallen in the past week?Do you believe curbs are out to get you?Have you ever fallen up stairs?Does your face usually break your fall?Have you gotten a concussion from a non-athletic activity?Does the concept of dancing make you uncomfortable?Have you ever spilled a drink on your computer?Do you live in fear of spilling something on your shirt?Do you think uneven sidewalks were created solely to make you look stupid?Do you seemingly bump into everyone on a crowded sidewalk?Do you routinely wake up with bruises?Do you spill every hot beverage you carry?Have you pulled a door when it clearly says push?Have you pushed a door when it clearly says pull?Have you ever changed your shirt before eating pasta?Do you routinely need to change your shirt AFTER eating pasta?Does having a catch give you anxiety?What about shaking hands?High-fives?Does multitasking scare the bejesus out of you?Was coloring within the lines an issue in your youth?Have you ever closed a car door on someone?Have you ever fallen down in the shower?Have you ever accidentally elbowed someone in the face while being tickled?Have you ever chipped a tooth?Have you recently cut yourself shaving?Are you terrified of holding babies, because you KNOW what will happen?Wait, have you dropped a baby?Do you have to apologize to people every time you get on public transportation?Have you ever headbutted someone when going in for a kiss?Have you ever broken a bone on a Slip'N Slide?Do doorways SEEM to get narrower every time you walk through them?Do you have a habit of accidentally leaning against things that are NOT stable?Do you have coffee stains on more than FIVE articles of clothing?Have you ever bumped into an inanimate object and reflexively said I'm sorry?Have you burned yourself cooking?Does chopping vegetables frequently lead to chopping fingers?Do treadmills look like death traps to you?What about trampolines?Do you avoid opening food containers because the contents will undoubtedly end up on you?Do you simply avoid white clothes?And red wine?Have you ever seriously considered wearing a bib?Do revolving doors seem like a trap?Do you always lose at Jenga?Have you ever put a car in drive instead of reverse (or vise versa)?Have you lost your wallet recently?What about your keys?Have you broken or lost two or more phones in the past year?Did you spill your coffee today?
How Big Of A Klutz Are You Actually?
You're an adorable klutz. Sure, you never know where your keys are and you spill shit on your shirt from time to time, but who doesn't?
You stare at your white shirts and sigh because you know it's only a matter of time before they're ruined. You try to have a stain-defender pen within arms reach at all times — but you always forget it. And meeting new people is always a disaster.
You cannot be trusted carrying anything — and you're fully aware of that fact. You spill hot coffee on yourself on a semi-daily basis and you believe uneven sidewalks are the work of the devil.
Jesus Christ, you're a walking disaster. You can't navigate your own living room without bashing your shin on the coffee table or your shoulder on the door frame. You're also probably reading this on your work computer because you lost your phone and spilled coffee on your computer.