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26 Disappointing Facts About This Year's Super Bowl

Everything you didn't know you needed to know about this year's big game.

1. Seahawks head coach Pete Carroll might be a 9/11 truther.

2. Seahawks star quarterback Russell Wilson gets his porn from Twitter.

3. Rob Gronkowski is friendly with Justin Bieber.


Sure, Rob Gronkowski is a football/party robot sent to Earth to redefine our lame ideas of what it means to be awesome — HOWEVER, enjoying the company of Justin Bieber is unforgivable.

4. Tom Brady does emo black-and-white Ugg commercials.

View this video on YouTube


The dog is cute, though. Can't hate on the pooch.

5. The Seahawks sell watered-down beer at CenturyLink Field.

6. Patriots owner Bob Kraft accused Vladamir Putin of stealing his Super Bowl ring.

7. Marshawn Lynch did not know that Buffalo was not New York City.

View this video on YouTube


He thought he was going to be hanging out with Jay Z.

8. Macklemore is a big Seahawks fan.

9. Jon Bon Jovi is good friends with Bob Kraft.

10. Patriots head coach Bill Belichick was — and still is — a smug lacrosse bro.

The surly Patriots coach grew up in lacrosse-crazed Maryland, a place where parents name their blazer-and-khaki-clad kids Tad, Chaz, and Landon. Belichick spent his formative years at Wesleyan University, in Connecticut, where he played both football and lacrosse. No offense to people that play and enjoy lacrosse, but you have to admit it makes him even more hatable.

11. This super-cool Patriots fan exists.

Pats fans show off tattoos, including “Belichick yourself before you wreck yourself” arm tat http://t.co/VljHwMAG2E

12. And this one.

Some of the worst tattoos NFL fans have ever gotten. What were they thinking? http://t.co/4UzoJNjopo

13. This picture of Seattle Seahawks General Manager John Schneider exists.

14. The New England Patriots Twitter account let THIS happen.

15. When Bob Kraft helped his VERY YOUNG girlfriend with her audition tape.

16. The Seahawks pay Texas A&M to use the term "12th Man."

In 2006, the Seahawks paid an initial $100,000 to the University to use term "12th Man" and pay an additional $5,000 every year. The current contract runs out in 2016.

17. The Patriots trademarked the phrase "Do Your Job."

18. Marshawn Lynch drives around with velvet ropes to guard his Lamborghini.

@FieldGulls beastmode's Lambo, complete with velvet ropes.

19. The Patriots kept the Tim Tebow soap opera alive.

20. This is how Tom Brady dances.

21. Russell Wilson's penis was featured on the cover of Sports Illustrated.

22. The Patriots have a fan that calls himself "God Masarati."

View this video on YouTube


23. Rob Gronkowski erotica exists.

24. The Seahawks compared their comeback victory over the Green Bay Packers to the civil rights movement — on MLK weekend.

Seahawks posted (then deleted) this MLK Day tweet. Equating the civil rights struggle with a football game? Good god.

25. Plenty of Seahawks fans left the NFC Championship game early and were refused re-entry.

That's what happens when you leave a game early.... #GBvsSEA

26. And finally, University of Phoenix Stadium was almost called Pink Taco Stadium.