2. You will know a lot less about this:
“Wait. What happened?”
10. Despite your best efforts, your kids will get their hands on your iPhone.
And this is what your photos will look like afterward.
17. It’s impossible to feel manly when folding said baby clothes.
Aww, look at the big man folding the tiny, widdle clothes.
18. The power of cute is more formidable than you realize.
Right now you’re like, “I’ll never give in to my kid’s whims and desires.” But you have never had a 3-year-old peer up at you and say, “Pwease? PWEASE?”
24. You won’t be able to watch movies where kids are killed or kidnapped.
When you have a little person in your house who you love more than anything, those movies hit a little too close to home.
28. You will love to watch kids’ movies.
This isn’t because the movies are so great (though most are tolerable these days), but because they’re an amazing bonding experience with your kid.
29. You will cram your entire adult life between the time your kid goes down and you go to sleep.
“Quick! Turn on The Walking Dead! Pour the wine! Tell me what you think about Obamacare! Ah, crap. It’s time for bed.”
31. And lastly, it’s all worth it.
OK, so this is something people will tell you, but it’s true. Even with all of the maddening things that come along with being a parent, being someone’s mommy or daddy is one of life’s most rewarding experiences.