Parenting is way harder than you thought it'd be.
Babies’ heads are magnetically attracted to doorways.
At 3 a.m. you don't care how cute a onesie is, you care how many snaps it has.
Your kid will go through way more Band-Aids than they actually need.
When your baby/toddler is acting up in public, people aren't judging you nearly as much as you think.
You should always — ALWAYS — make your kid go to the bathroom before you leave anywhere.
At least 50% of the straps on high chairs in restaurants are broken (or at least it feels that way).
If something is wrong with your kid, they're usually trying to tell you what it is — even before they can actually talk.
Your kid is watching you every day for cues on how to be a human.
Never give your kid a bedside glass of water unless you’re cool with taking them to the bathroom at 3 a.m.
If you don’t freak out when your kid falls down they might not either.
Staying fit becomes a whole lot harder.
You will need to find the balance between getting sleep and personal time.
Little kids like to talk about boring stuff, but talking to them about it is a huge part of their development.
Kids cannot keep a secret.
There’s no quicker way to make sure your kid is listening than by fighting with your partner.
Yelling at a kid to stop throwing a tantrum will only make them tantrum harder.
Kids will ask for way more toys than they need.
You can't take enough photos — and especially videos — of your kid.
If your kid has a security blanket or toy, it's smart to order a spare online.
If your kid is in a bad mood, put them in water.
Kids have an amazing memory.
On most days you try to be the best parent you can, but on others just keeping your kid alive is a win.
You will develop a serious DGAF attitude.
Toddlers will scream when you're putting them in the high chair, but they usually chill out once you've got them secured in it.
Distraction is one of a parent's best weapons.
Your tolerance for gross things will grow exponentially.
You learn to put your kid first in life.
If your kid cries when you leave them, they usually stop crying a minute or two after you're gone.
Dealing with other parents can sometimes feel like high school all over again.
Kids eat way less food than you think.
Never act smug if your kid isn't going through the terrible twos, because they might end up being a threenager.
Watching your kid interact with others when they don't know you're watching is pretty amazing.
If potty training isn't working, it's probably because your kid isn't ready and NOT because you're doing it wrong.
One of the most important things you can work on is patience.
There are few — if any — things in life that will give you more pride and self-respect than knowing your kid feels safe and loved.
Kisses, hugs, and cuddles from your kid are at the very top of the best things in life.
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