If you've read even one post about parenting tweets on BuzzFeed, you've undoubtedly laughed at something written by James Breakwell (aka @XplodingUnicorn).
The tired dad, who has four (that's right, FOUR) young daughters, has amassed over a million followers on Twitter thanks to funny observations — and LOL-inducing exchanges with his equally funny daughters.
2-year-old: *mashes buttons on a toy phone* Me: Who are you texting? 2: Boys. Me: What are you telling them? 2: They smell like poop.
LOLOLOLOL.
Me: What do you want for a snack? 4-year-old: Spaghetti. Me: That's not a snack. 4: It is if you just make a little bit.
Like, his girls are going places.
Me: What did you do at school today? 5-year-old: Learned about dragons. Me: Your class learned about dragons? 5: I learned about dragons. I don't know what everybody else was doing.
See what I mean?
Me: Only female mosquitos bite. 7-year-old: I knew that. Me: You did? 7: Girls always do all the work.
Considering how awesome his daughters are, you might be surprised to hear that Breakwell has written a book entitled Bare Minimum Parenting: The Ultimate Guide to Not Quite Ruining Your Child.
Basically, Breakwell is saying that overachieving parents' kids don't turn out any better than other kids, so if you want to skip your kid's soccer one day, do it!
In fact, the book — which features a number of graphs — makes a case that doing less as a parent is actually smart.
Breakwell says, "Parents feel more pressure than ever to be perfect thanks to social media... This book is the permission they’re looking for to raise their kids how they want to, not how everybody else wants them to."
Now, you might be thinking this whole bare minimum parenting thing is just an excuse for Breakwell to slack off while, say, his toddler plays with a can of beer and the family pig (yes, the Breakwells have a pet pig).
Wife: What are you doing in there? Me: *watching the pig fight my toddler over a can of beer* Reading.
But Breakwell says that today's parents — pressured to overachieve — can stand to consider the book's point. "I set out to write 50,000 words worth of jokes, but by the end, I accidentally proved a point: Doing less as a parent isn’t just easier; it’s also better for your kid."
