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19 Things That Will Make 40-Ish People Go, "Fuck, I'm Old!"

Your mom doesn't think you look old. She thinks you look great!

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2. And "finding" it on your ears and eyebrows.

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Can anyone explain why, after all this time, your eyebrows suddenly decided to grow their hair out? You're embarrassing yourselves, eyebrows!

3. Speaking of hair, you're noticing more and more gray ones. Not enough to get your hair dyed, but enough to make you worry about when (or if) you should.

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You may have even thought, "What if I color the grays with a permanent marker? Maybe that would work!"

4. You recently realized that — for the first time in your life — you're older than almost every major league baseball player.

8. You are not amused by all of the '90s parties, which basically ask people to show up like you dressed in high school.

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"I will not allow my youth to be turned into a caricature!" You rant at your Green Day poster while watching your DVD of Forrest Gump.

9. If you get carded, it's with a sheepish, "Sorry about this, sir. We have to card everyone. We'd card you if you were 80."

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"..if you were 80." If that doesn't make you feel young, spry, and not nearing the end of your life, I don't know what will!

10. Your doctor gave you "the talk." This talk isn't about sex, but how you need to be healthier as you age. Sigh.

11. When you're looking for something to watch on TV, you usually end up re-watching, say, Back to the Future or Friday instead of any of the hot new shows.

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You now totally get why old people in retirement homes spent most of their time watching black and white movies from the '40s.

12. You no longer recognize — or understand — the moves people make on the dance floor.

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And when you do "The Cabbage Patch" it doesn't go over nearly as well as it once did.

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