1.
there's a new guy at work starting called Wayne Bruce and I said "ah, my old nemesis ManBat" and nobody got it honestly i am wasted here
2.
I have a co-worker who likes to print out memes and put them on her office wall. I came in to ask her a question and saw a new pic of what I thought was Gordon Ramsay in a wig and said ‘who put that wig on Gordon Ramsay’ and it turns out it was a pic of her great aunt who passed
3.
Me: Sorry I’m late, I had to say goodbye to my dog today. Co-worker: Oh, I’m so sorry. What happened? Me: He just has a really bad day if I forget to say it.
4.
co-worker: i have something to do tomorrow can you cover my shif- me:
5.
There is no pain greater than losing a loved one except for running into a co-worker outside of work
6.
me to co-worker: how was your weekend? co-worker: it was great! I meal-prepped for the week, watched an entire Netflix series, and finally got some new bath towels! You? me:
7.
Co-Worker : I Don’t Know How I’m Gone Get Home Me : Damn..
8.
So my coworker is getting married tomorrow and we decorated her office and now we’re all in HR bc someone bought her lingerie and cuffs and she got offended 😩
9.
*passes coworker in hall* me:
10.
The new girl at work just sent me this
11.
Co-worker: I can’t find you on Facebook. Me: I know. I found you first and blocked you.
12.
Once saw a co-worker cry for 15 minutes when her Excel file crashed...another co-worker passed and said "Jesus saves and so should you." She cried for another 15 minutes...🤣 https://t.co/9xvlwAPmvM
13.
When your co-worker brings donuts to the office and you have to pretend you don't want one immediately
14.
A guy at work today said “these millenniums or whoever they are” and shook his head and that was just the end of the thought for him but not even a little bit for me.
15.
@davidmbarnett Yesterday a co-worker's email to the whole company began with this accidental declaration: "Hell to all"
16.
co-worker: hey- me: what is it I'm very busy co-worker: your bluetooth is connected to the breakroom tv [we keep eye contact as I try to pause shrek 2 but accidentally just turn up the volume]
17.
This how my coworker left us 😭
18.
If I hear my adjacent co-worker refer to googling something as “you have to do it in your google” one more fucking time... I’m gonna be a new tier of sad and not do anything about it
19.
Co-worker: I’m 25. How old are you? Me: 18 Co-worker: You’re such a baby. Me: Wow, and yet we’re both at the same job doing the same thing.
20.
Had to act like I thought Amy Schumer was funny so my co-worker, who loves her, would take my shift.
21.
Me: I will not be awkward today Co-worker: Hey! Me: Good thanks!