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    19 Ways "Old You" Is Definitely The Best You

    You're not old. You're 29 plus shipping and handling.

    1. You're no longer bothered in the slightest if someone doesn't like you.


    2. You make no effort to hide the fact your DVR is entirely made up of House Hunters and Dateline NBC episodes.

    20th Century Fox

    3. You've woken up after a night of drunk online shopping to discover you ordered a blood pressure monitor and cold packs.

    4. When young people complain about "how old they are" you sit back and listen like this:


    Pray tell, child.

    5. And when a young person goes on and on about the drama in their life you just shake your head and smile.

    6. You feel no shame for not knowing a young celebrity's name.


    7. And if you do know a young celebrity, it's because they're "Melanie Griffith's daughter" or "Julia Roberts' niece."

    Paramount / MTV

    You: "American Horror Story? Is that the one with Julia Roberts' niece?"

    Young person: "Yes, Emma Roberts."

    You: [laughing on the inside]

    8. You bravely chant "Donna Martin graduates!" at every graduation you attend, even though 90% of the attendees don't know what the heck you're saying.


    Do you care? No. Because it's still funny, damn it.

    9. You know that going to bed early doesn't make you any less of a badass.

    10. When someone asks you if you want to go to a club you're like:


    Although, let's be honest, the invitations come less and less these days.

    11. You suddenly relate to Ozzy Osbourne.


    12. You unapologetically call things what they used to be called back in the day.


    You refer to audiobooks as "books on tape" and you don't DVR shows, you "Tivo" (or even "tape!") them.

    13. You pretty much only listen to music that came out when you were in high school and college and you are perfectly fine with that.


    14. If something breaks in your home, you actually know how to fix it.


    15. You sometimes use current slang — like "Show me the receipts!" — in front of young 'uns to embarrass them.


    Trolling the youth is one of the best parts of getting older.

    16. You've taken up a hobby you would have made fun of when you were younger but DO. NOT. CARE.

    17. You’ve transitioned from saying “These damn kids!” ironically to saying it with total sincerely.

    Warner Bros.

    You: "What are all these damn kids doing here?"

    Your (younger) friend: "LOL. 'Damn kids.'"

    You: "LOL?"

    18. When you find a gray hair you forget about it within 90 seconds — which is way better than the existential crisis it used to cause.


    19. And even though your back hurts and you have a few wrinkles, you like yourself a whole lot more today than yesterday.


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