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    21 Foolproof Ways To Look Busy At Work

    "I'd love to help with that but I have to print off all these emails."

    1. Have a fucking filthy desk.

    2. Check your watch heaps.

    3. Walk really fast everywhere.

    4. Put Post-it Notes all over your office.

    5. Eat lunch at your desk.

    6. Use a landline.

    7. Make excited exclamations.

    8. Hold everything you own.

    9. Look exasperated.

    10. DON'T SMILE.

    11. Look like this instead.

    12. Spike your smoothies.

    13. Wear headphones.

    14. Take joyrides.

    15. Print out copious amounts of important "documents".

    16. Take one actual business call a day and be loud as hell.

    17. Never underestimate the power of a good highlighter.

    18. Always poop at work.

    19. Massage your temples.

    20. Get a kid.

    21. Tell everyone how busy you are.