Chrissy Teigen Opened Up About The "Brutal, Exhausting, Sad, Physically Challenging, [And] Mentally Painful" Last Two Months

    "I think it’s happening."

    Marissa G. Muller
    by Marissa G. Muller

    BuzzFeed Staff

    It's been two months since Chrissy Teigen shared her grief with the world over the tragic loss of her baby, Jack. Throughout that time, she's opened up about her experience in an essay and in a joint interview with her husband John Legend.

    Today, Chrissy reflected on the days since Jack passed away, which she described as "brutal, exhausting, sad, physically challenging, [and] mentally painful" in an Instagram caption.

    "When I’m old and grey, I will look back on the last two months as being brutal, exhausting, sad, physically challenging, mentally painful bitches of a couple months," she wrote. "But I refuse to not find humor in both the rage-fits and the outfits."

    "I already see the leaves as orange instead of grey, realized the sky is indeed blue and not black and horn honks on my forced morning walks only bring me to my knees half the time."

    "I can make it up my stairs only stopping once or twice instead of every other, and can get out of the bathtub all by myself as long as I have the promise John will dry me off."

    "Anyhow the point is, fuuuuuuuuuuuck, I think it’s happening ❤️," she finished.

    Two days ago, Chrissy let her followers know that she has been quiet on Twitter because she's in a "grief depression hole," but said she has "so much help around [her] to get better and [she'll] be fixed soon."

    chrissy teigen @chrissyteigen

    I’m not tweeting much because I’m honestly in a bit of a grief depression hole but do not worry as I have so much help around me to get better and I’ll be fixed soon. they’ll call when im better and ready for pickup and u can swing by and grab me ok? thank u and love you!

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    "I feel broken and all I know is [that that's] the opposite of fixed," she later clarified, adding, "I am in a very dark bubble and incapable of expressing what is happening and doing the best I can."

    chrissy teigen @chrissyteigen

    @shcro1 I am in a very dark bubble and incapable of expressing what is happening and doing the best I can. I feel broken and all I know is the opposite is fixed - I know it isn’t that easy but it’s all I can think of at the moment. Did not mean to offend.

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    Last week, Chrissy shared her gratitude for all of the support she's received, saying, alongside John, "I have thousands of letters written to me. Obviously it's so painful to go through something like this as a woman — something that was inside your body that you were nurturing. But obviously there's a father involved, and the support for the both of us has just been so beautiful. So incredible."