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    15 Things You'll Only Understand If You're Secretly Mean

    My lips say, "No biggie!" but my eyes scream, "YOU ARE DEAD TO ME."

    1. Someone you hate goes through a painful breakup, and you're like:

    FOX

    But you feel like:

    Warner Bros. Pictures

    2. A friend cancels on you at the last minute, and you're like:

    NBC

    But you're really like:

    ABC

    3. Your hairdresser fucks up your hair and you're like:

    Paramount Pictures

    But you're really like:

    HBO

    4. Someone gives you a backhanded compliment, and you're like:

    FOX

    But you're really like:

    Paramount Pictures

    5. Your roommate borrows your sweater without asking, and you're like:

    Comedy Central

    But you're really like:

    ABC

    6. A stranger steps on your foot and quickly apologizes, and you're like:

    CBS

    But you're really like:

    Big Machine

    7. Your coworker gives their long-winded political opinion that no one asked for, and you're like:

    Netflix

    But you're really like:

    Columbia Pictures/ Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer

    8. A waiter seriously fucks up your order and you're like:

    The Weinstein Company

    But you're really like:

    HBO

    9. Your manager asks at you to do something and you're like:

    ABC

    But you're really like:

    HBO

    10. Your significant other gives you a shitty birthday gift and you're like:

    IFC

    But you're really like:

    CBS

    11. When you hit a cutie up only to get a "sorry, who is this?" text, you're like:

    VH1

    But you're actually like:

    HBO

    12. A stranger tells you that your backpack is open, and you're like:

    ABC

    But you're really like:

    Disney

    13. Your asshole coworker seriously fucks up their presentation, and you're like:

    Disney

    But you feel like:

    Disney

    14. Your significant other calls you out on your shit, and you're like, "I totally understand. Thank you for loving me":

    ABC

    But you're really like:

    FOX

    15. So yeah, you're really mean...

    The CW

    ...but it's fine because no one can tell!

    NBC

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