We hope you love our recommendations! Some may have been sent as samples, but all were independently selected by our editors. Just FYI, BuzzFeed and its publishing partners may collect a share of sales and/or other compensation from the links on this page.
1. A coffee mug for any foul-mouthed fiend who wants a sprinkle of swears with their spoonful of sugar.
2. A game of jizz roulette that's gonna make your (equally inappropriate friends) wanna ~cum~ over for game night, every night.
3. An adult coloring book you'd have to be a ~dick~ to not love coloring in.
4. An oven mitt for people who know exactly how much they love food.
5. A festive candle that'll be a gift that's sure to ~sleigh~.
6. A bedtime story for parents whose parental block goes to bed hours before their child decides to.
7. A Big Bastard Douchebag suitcase sure to be the best thing ever when you need to carry a shit-ton of stuff.
8. An iPhone case to give someone who likes to have their phone lookin' as juicy as they do while they're swiping right all night.
9. A hand-wired ring for those moments when you wish you could give yourself the finger.
10. A crappy game for parents who live for potty humor.
11. A sassy mug that perfectly describes how you are before you've finished your morning coffee.
12. A drinking card game you and your friends are sure to love, even when it turns all you cool cats into asshats.
13. A picture book for people who like to picture their penis basically everywhere.
14. A gold key that has the ability to unlock the perfect comeback.
15. A pair of nice balls you can play with anytime you need to squeeze the stress away.
16. A T-bag teabag for anyone who thinks that poorly steeped loose leaf tastes like balls.
17. A birthday card that's gonna answer an ~eggcellent~ question you didn't know you didn't want to know.
18. A not-subtle-enough Christmas sweater that'll make Santa say, "Sorry ~Deer,~ you're on the naughty list."
19. A dog calendar that's sure to make every single shitty day better.
20. A set of three washcloths — every guest who uses these will think they're the tits.
21. A baby onesie to give new parents who know their baby's smile is gonna help them when sleepless nights have them feeling down in the ~dumps.~
22. A rubber tree for anyone who loves plants, hard.
23. A coffee table book that'll shock anyone who dares try and use it as a coaster.
24. A magnet pack of 72 refrigerator obscenities sure to help you ~stick~ with your passion for poetry.
25. A game of hoopla that's gonna be a ton of fun, even if it's a lot ~harder~ than you think it should be.
26. Or a wholesome game of You've Got Crabs for close friends who love getting together and having a laugh, even when they're feeling ~crabby.~
27. A premium seasoning you can throw on any shitty dish to make it way more delicious.
28. And finally, a pair of penis or middle finger earrings (or get both and pair them together) for accessorizing with some serious statement pieces.
When your friends say your humor is too inappropriate.
Not enough here for your crude humor? Check out these posts below!
19 Things You Need If You Like Cute Stuff And Also Love To Swear
Shopping for something specific? Check out BuzzFeed Reviews to find the best things for every budget!
