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    If You Get Excited About Any Of These 37 Products, You Might Actually Be An Adult

    Hi I'm Mallory and organized countertops turn me on. I am...an adult.

    1. A stunning acacia wood chef's board that can be used as a prep station, cutting board, or serving board. Cost-effective end-grain wood in a patchwork pattern? That's what's cooking!

    2. A coffee of the month subscription, because your work hours do not include a nap break so some glorious hot bean juice just might be the only thing that keeps you going.

    3. A whimsically chic rainbow mirror to ~reflect~ on your childhood through a practical, adult purchase.

    4. An electric toothbrush because as an adult, not having a root canal might make you smile even wider than when you got a kitten on your sixth birthday.

    5. A pack of silicone straws that are dishwasher-safe (drool) and easy to take anywhere (heckin' joy). That pride you feel when you're being a good kid to Mother Earth? That's adult.

    6. A powder polish for giving your kitchenware a well deserved scrub after you watch Beauty and the Beast with your kid and start feeling guilty about the condition of your own flatware friends.

    7. An exposed bulb table lamp no one would dare throw any ~shade~ at. Home decor everyone loves? Love it.

    8. A peel-and-stick wallpaper that'll brighten up your home with its marvelous, Mediterranean tile touch. Adults love a backsplash. They love it.

    9. A rattan rolling market cart with a design so chic, it's sure to make everything you buy look like it came straight from your local farmers market...even though you've secretly stuffed six boxes of Pizza Rolls underneath your organic arugula.

    10. A startlingly lovely resin toilet brush holder for making your Instagram followers believe that even the ~crappiest~ parts of your life are photo-worthy.

    11. A box of chore sticks to help your kiddos keep the house clean by making the process seem slightlyyyy more fun. Playing "pickup sticks" is gonna be way more efficient at your house.

    12. A colorful distressed rug for realists who want a lovely rug designed for the slips, stains, and spills that happen when you let your family actually live in the living room.

    13. An aromatherapy spray that'll soothe your senses and help you fall asleep if you're prone to stay up counting your worries rather than counting sheep.

    14. A trend-setting pair of oversized aviators with rose mirror lenses, a bold brow bar frame, and (get ready, grown ups!) a sexy lifetime warranty.

    15. A mid-century planter that can (fortunately) double as a fancy trash can when you inevitably kill your plant friend.

    16. An enameled Dutch oven for first time chefs who have officially watched (and rewatched) Salt, Fat, Acid Heat enough times to finally use their kitchen properly.

    17. A cordless Dyson vacuum because cleaning without this thing sucks — you won't realize what a chore vacuuming was until you have this in your life forever.

    18. A vertical shoe tower sure to have your entryway looking organized and elevated.

    19. A wine stain remover so you can spill the tea (when your "tea" is red wine) without ruining your favorite sundress.

    20. A pair of metal planters that'll get so many compliments you'll love having them around your place.

    21. A terribly cute lunch bag for storing your lunchtime snacks in a bag as sweet as your favorite treats are.

    22. A bar cart to proudly show that you are old enough to drink, afford, and display alcohol in your home.

    23. A pair of mid-height sneaker boots so lightweight you're gonna wonder if they're made with witchcraft. Grab these and you just might actually keep up with your kids the next time you go on a family hike. Magic.

    24. A pair of outlet lights so you can have your rooms shine even at nighttime, without bulky night lights taking up space.

    25. A too-cute four slice toaster you're gonna love if serving your whole family at once keeps you from being ~toast~ in the morning rush to work and school.

    26. A bidet because when you realize that washing your bottom after using the bathroom makes just as much sense as washing your hands, you're never gonna want to wipe with that dry, wasteful, less-efficient toilet paper ever again.

    27. A hand-crafted ceramic essential oil diffuser so you can cover up the smell of your bulldog (who is definitely not supposed to be your roommate) and breathe easy when your landlord comes over and says, "That's a dog...gone beautiful diffuser you have there!"

    28. A wire basket so even your pantry can look picture perfect.

    29. A linen futon in a cheery mustard yellow that's sure to have you thinking, "Well color me impressed!" every time you step into your living room and see the prime palette you've put together.

    30. A shirt folder that'll give you perfectly crisp and beautifully folded shirts that'll bring a tear to your type-A father's eye when he comes to visit.

    31. A table runner for any baseball fans who have grown to want home decor that's a home run(ner).

    32. A six foot blanket ladder — a practical piece that's sure to step-up your decor game.

    33. A 16-piece dinnerware set for serving your dino nuggets on something extra special.

    34. A stainless-steel cleaner that'll wipe up grease, stains, and fingerprints faster than you're able to say "cleaning the sink sucks." Turns out, it doesn't with this stuff.

    35. A throw blanket, at a massively reduced price, for bargain hunters who refuse to buy anything but the very best.

    36. A pack of pimple patches, because you can't run as fast as when you were as a teenager, but with these you can at least get rid of zits faster.

    37. And finally, a huggable heating pad that'll help you out when adulthood feels like pain in the neck and you need a friendly face to get you through.

    When I catch myself enthusiastically talking with friends about adding a backsplash to the kitchen sink:

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