back to top

17 Majestically Useless Items From The Innovations Catalogue

So many crap gadgets.

Posted on

When it folded in 2003, regular readers were distraught. One left the following comment on a BBC article:

I have admired Innovations from early childhood and am genuinely distressed by this turn of events. Luckily, I am wearing sponge-lined spectacles with integral FM tuner to absorb my tears (while I listen to the latest pop hits in style and comfort).

Here are a few of the heroically pointless gadgets that graced the pages of Innovations.

Advertisement

4. A "Milk bottle planter".

Bloomsbury Publishing Plc

"The soil provides superb natural insulation for for the lidded central compartment which holds four milk bottles, fully protected against sub-zero temperatures, summer heat and the attacks of birds."

Advertisement

7. "Bathrobics".

Bloomsbury Publishing Plc

"A safe new exercise routine that you can do in the comfort and privacy of your own bath tub. Bathrobics pack consists of 10 double-sided waterproof cards, a display stand which sticks to the rim of the bath with a rubber sucker and full instruction booklet."

8. "Ionic Shoe Freshener".

Bloomsbury Publishing Plc

"After each wearing, slip the device into your shoes and switch on. The fanless technology silently draws in fresh air along with freshening negative ions."

Advertisement

10. "The Gemini Skin System".

Bloomsbury Publishing Plc

"Clinical trials have demonstrated that the Gemini System can increase the elasticity of the skin using a process called Galvanic Iontophoresis. This means creating a flow of ions through the skin from a negative pad to a positive pad."

Advertisement

Taken from The Very Best Of The Innovations Catalogue, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc.