We recently wrote a post where brides shared why they called off their marriages on their wedding day — or right before it. In the comments, more brides shared their stories of why they walked away from their relationships before tying the knot. Here are their eye-opening responses:
Note: Some responses were pulled from this Reddit thread by u/Skyguard.
1. "He nonchalantly told me on the drive to the church that if I 'got fat' after the wedding, he would leave me and never contact me again. I asked him to pull over, got out of the car, and walked to my mother’s house, where I explained the situation, canceled the wedding, and blocked him."
—31, Illinois
2. "I called off my wedding four months before the day. I was supposed to marry my high school sweetheart. I had zero motivation to plan my wedding. At that four-month mark before the wedding, I only had a venue. I didn’t have a photographer, a cake, or a DJ. Deep down in my heart, I knew we had grown apart, and we were practically living separate lives under the same roof. I had started to develop feelings for someone else, and I believe that that doesn’t happen if you’re truly in love with someone."
"I called my dad, and I told him I couldn’t marry my fiancé, and he understood. My mom, on the other hand, didn't understand and told my fiancé before I could. He was rightfully very upset, and we didn't end things well. I didn’t talk to my mom for almost an entire year. I do regret how things went down, but I don’t regret the decision to end things. It’s been five years since then, and I’m about to marry the man I developed feelings for, and I’m happier than I’ve ever been."
—30, Illinois
3. "His sister was VERY involved in his life and our wedding planning, and she kinda became my de facto best friend. The morning of the wedding, I went to her place to pick up the bridesmaids' gifts. As I was walking up to the door, I could clearly see her making out with someone in the front window. I remember thinking, 'Good for her!' because she hadn't dated anyone during our four years together. I just let myself in, like always, prepared to tease her about her hookup. That is when I saw she was making out with my soon-to-be husband/her BROTHER! I didn't say anything. I just turned and walked out."
"I drove straight home to Denver (from California). I only told a few people why I bailed because I was embarrassed and didn't think people would believe me. My friends and family were very upset with me for years. I finally found 'the one,' and everything worked out, but he and his SISTER are still both unmarried and now live together in Oregon. I never did figure out what was really going on with them."
—32, Oklahoma
4. "I got engaged very young, and it was like I was engaged to a different person than who I was dating. He became super controlling and would leave for work early and come home very late. He became addicted to running and neglected me emotionally. I tried my best to save the relationship (couples counseling, etc). He was incapable of hearing me. I was getting super depressed and sicker by the day thinking about planning our wedding. I knew if I married him, I would always be walking on eggshells in my own home and constantly worried he would hurt me. (He liked to 'joke' about how he would kill me)."
"I called my parents and told them I needed to leave. I packed up while he was at work the next day and left and never looked back. I’ve never regretted my decision for a single day, and now, I feel like my very best self."
—35, California
5. "I called off the wedding a month before after accidentally meeting his ‘girlfriend.’ We had no communication for two years when he contacted me and said how sorry he was, that he had grown up and realized I was the one. I accepted the apology, and we planned another wedding. I cried at my wedding, and it wasn’t tears of joy. I knew I was making a mistake."
"A week after the wedding, he confesses that he was living with the ‘girlfriend from before' and 'living with her convinced me to marry you.' Ten years and three kids later, I divorced him — best decision I ever made."
—23, California
6. "I caught my husband-to-be being intimate with my maid of honor (former best friend) on our wedding day. My friends tried to tell me, and I wouldn't listen. What could either of them say? They were caught. I immediately went to my dad, calmly told him what happened, and then walked down the aisle by myself...and made an announcement to the invited guests that the wedding was off."
"Then, I asked them to collect any gifts they brought and take them back as well as to enjoy the reception. Food, drinks, and cake already paid for. I then marched down the aisle and left for a solo honeymoon, which he'd fully paid for. Less than three months later he married her, and after two kids in three years, he left her for another girl."
—55, USA
7. "We decided to get married three months into the relationship so 'we could be together' under one visa because I was going to study overseas. He was 33, divorced, with a stubborn 3-year-old (who was conceived when he and the ex-wife were supposedly separated) who hasn’t heard the word 'no.' With a time difference of over five hours, I had to give up my sleep because he wanted to speak to me when I woke up, and I had to stay up 'til he finished work and spoke to me. Multiple texts and/or calls one after the other if I fell asleep or was unavailable. The codependency, psychotic behavior, and anger issues started showing quite fast."
"I practically had to choose between him and my education and career. I had enough at one point but didn’t want to disappoint my parents, because what would they tell all these guests if the wedding was canceled?! Funny enough, my entire family was relieved when I called it off. A few months later, I heard he got married. Zero regrets."
—27, Australia
8. "Three months ago, I saw him cheating with my friend. I had tried to ignore the memory because it made me so uncomfortable, but all of my attraction to him disappeared. Because of pressure from my family to settle down and get married, I had pretended to like him and accepted his proposal, but I was so scared at the possibility of spending the rest of my life with him. But if I left him, my parents would be so disappointed, and I didn’t think I could handle that. As I was walking down the aisle, though, I saw him, and how he was smiling, and all I saw was his infidelity. So, I let go of my father’s hand and walked right back up the aisle!'
"After leaving the church, I got into an Uber and took a selfie of myself in my wedding dress, the church growing smaller in the distance as the car drove away. I sent the picture to my ex-fiancé with the caption, 'My life begins today,' then blocked him. #NoRegrets."
—34, Rhode Island
9. "I overheard him telling a friend that he was only marrying me to get his ex jealous!"
—29, Florida
10. "I called my wedding off one month before. I had so much fun planning the wedding and thinking about our future until I got back from my bachelorette. I realized the last and final thing to do was to actually get married, and the planning part was done. Something just didn't feel right. I told him I wasn't sure if I was ready to be married yet, but I didn't want to break up. He told me he was totally OK with postponing and waiting. But when I actually called the wedding off, he flipped; he claimed that he only said he was OK with postponing because he didn't think I'd actually call it off."
"Spent the next six months getting dumped and then getting back together, until I finally stopped fighting to stay together. The way he acted after the fact confirmed my gut feeling that something was off. Not going through with the wedding was the best thing I could've done for myself, but it definitely put me through emotional turmoil for about a year."
—30, Pennsylvania
11. "I lived with a girl (just roommates), and her best friend called off a wedding at the last minute. The groom was very possessive, and things just got worse on a slow build. Finally, it all just kind of came to a head, and she was like, I think we need some more time. He flipped."
"I can't remember anything in particular, but I ended up dating the girl a little after, and wowie zowie... There were issues."
12. "My best friend's older brother was getting married, and I was invited as my best friend's 'dat'" to it. I drive home on Friday for the ceremony the next day. I meet up with my best friend as soon as I get home, and her first words out of her mouth are, 'So, guess what just happened.' I correctly guessed that that morning, the wedding had been called off. I don't quite remember all of the details, but I remember that the groom's family was very excited about it. When he started dating this woman, things were very normal, and the family loved her. After the proposal, she started showing another side of herself. She was erratic and irrational. She started getting in between the groom and his family."
"When she and the groom moved in together, the groom's family bought him this plant as a housewarming gift (he, for some reason, really liked this particular species of plant). His fiancée demanded he get rid of it: "We are starting a life together so everything should be ours; I want all remnants of your former life without me gone.
I think the morning before the wedding, as I'm driving to my hometown, the bride and groom and each one's family got together for breakfast or something. The bride started an argument with the groom's mom, being very very disrespectful. The groom defended his mom, and the bride called off the wedding. This argument was over something stupid, too, nothing at all that should affect a relationship.
The best part was that his groomsmen decided to throw him a re-bachelor's party. They just got completely wasted, had blowup dolls, and random stuff like that. They also ate the top tier of the wedding cake, something that is traditionally reserved for the bride and groom to share. The ex-bride-to-be got super pissed when she saw that on Facebook."
13. "I didn't call it off the day before, but I've still called off a wedding. My boyfriend at the time proposed to me the summer before he left for medical school across the globe, and I was still finishing my last year of college. We were both making little-to-no money, and our respective families were going to have to straddle all costs. The stress of planning a wedding, trying to graduate, and holding it all together while I spoke to my S.O. only a few times out of the week eventually took its toll on me."
"I cracked, and first cancelled the wedding and eventually broke it off all together. Life can take you in so many directions."
14. "It's not my story, but my friend went to a wedding where the bride ran away the day before. This was a very expensive wedding in Puerto Rico where the guests were all flown in for a beach ceremony. The groom was in the military, and he and the bride had been doing long distance for a couple of years. They decided to have an open relationship once the groom found out that she was cheating on him. She was dating another guy for about a year before the ceremony, but for some reason, they went along with the engagement and wedding anyway. Her parents spent a small fortune. My friend packed a lot of additional clothing and swimwear, saying that she was ready to turn the trip into a vacation. Sure enough, the day before the wedding the bride disappeared. "
"She ran off with the other guy she was seeing and canceled via phone call. My friend had a fun, pleasant vacation. Oh, and this was apparently the second time this bride called off a wedding."
—Anonymous
And finally...
15. "There were plenty of red flags I ignored because I found someone who I thought loved me. He would have mood swings, gaslight me, and try to alienate me from my family because they, as he said, 'hated him and wanted to start sh*t.' Then, it was the money thing; he lied about that, lied about living with his parents, which I did too, so it wouldn’t have bothered me. Then, there was the getting mad at me when I had texted a friend, asking for advice about him. But the real dealbreaker was when my mom was in the hospital, and he wouldn’t reschedule 'an appointment' or 'interview' — he kept changing his story — to come with me to see her in the ICU. He never called. I told him on Facebook Messenger that I think we should call it off so I could work on my mental health, school, and spending time with family and close friends. His response? 'The fact that you said CLOSE friends when we are supposed to be BEST friends speaks volumes.'"
"If that is the case, where the hell was he when I was dealing with the loss of my mom? Where was he when they took her off life support? Probably still at his parents' house, lying about being employed. Oh, and did I mention we were together for three years and friends longer? But, hey, I dumped him over Facebook since that was the only way he wanted to communicate lately, and then, I got my master's, cut my hair, and lost 30+ pounds on the exercise bike he got me. And since my mom didn’t like him, on her behalf, I unfriend him on her Facebook after she passed. So, yeah, I am doing a lot better without him!"
—33, USA
Fellow brides — and grooms — if you've ever called off a wedding last-minute, feel free to share your story in the comments below.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.