Look, Canadian elections are far from perfect. But thank fuck that we are not America.
1.First of all, American elections are too damn long. Canadians know when to stop.
2.Do you not have other things to do?
3.Canadians complained about the 78-day election period in 2015 (they're usually between 35 and 55 days). Meanwhile, America has been at this since the damn dawn of time.
7.We're so much more reasonable with campaign finances — including a spending cap for parties and a lower limit on donations.
8.We don't make candidates verbally approve their messages.
9.And we've got a single nonpartisan organization to keep everyone in line.
10.Whereas the whole world pays attention to US elections, everyone ignores Canada. This is a good thing when you just want to tune out for five precious minutes.
11.Canadian elections just make more sense. What is a primary? WHAT IS AN ELECTORAL COLLEGE? WHO MADE UP THIS NONSENSE?
12.American ballots are just so extra. Look at this.
Now look at ours. You make an "X" and skip on home. So simple, so smart.
13.And we don't fuck around with that electronic voting crap.
14.Our media waits until all polls are closed before reporting results.
15.And celebrities don't feel the need to make obnoxious "go vote" videos.
16.Every candidate has pros and cons, but we will happily take this comparison.
17.And worst case scenario, we have a back-up plan with a great hat collection.
