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24 Secrets Twentysomethings Will Never Tell You

The future freaks you out.

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1. You still call your parents and ask what to do anytime something goes wrong.

"Hey mom, dad? Yeah, uh, my tire is flat... Oh, I should call Triple AAA? Right."

2. And when you're sick, you legitimately wish you could go to your parents' house to be taken care of.

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MOM, PLEASE RUB MY HEAD AND TELL ME EVERYTHING WILL BE OK.

3. None of us have any idea what we are doing with our lives.

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What do you mean by "five year plan?"

4. You buy into every Tinder success story, even though you're 99% sure they're entirely made up.

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My friend's cousins' brother's friend found her SOULMATE on Tinder. True story.

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5. You consistently pretend to understand your finances all while hoping TurboTax doesn't royally screw you when it comes time for tax season.

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**Clicks yes for everything.**

6. Your life on Instagram is infinitely cooler than your real life actually is.

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It's the illusion that matters.

7. You pretended to grow out of drinking Franzia, but you never actually stopped drinking it after college.

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

8. Your idea of a "balanced breakfast" is two cups of coffee before 9 a.m.

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Beans are vegetables.

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9. And Annie's macaroni and cheese is your idea of a healthy meal.

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It's ORGANIC.

10. Every time another person you grew up with gets engaged or announces a pregnancy, your urge to drink becomes stronger.

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But we're like.... still only 15 years old!??!?!

11. You're secretly holding out for Bill Gates to take care of your student loans.

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12. You pulled all nighters in college, so sometimes you think you still can.

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Hint: You can't.

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13. You've lied about having the flu when you were actually just hungover and ashamed.

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But I only had three beers...

14. The only reason you would help your friends move is if it filled your workout quota for the year.

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Lifting heavy boxes is enough of a workout for one year.

15. If you're invited to a wedding that is more than 20 miles away, and it does not have an open bar, you probably won't be in attendance.

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16. Your idea of romance is when someone texts you using emojis.

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17. And your idea of maturing means buying the more expensive bed option at IKEA.

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Even if you still struggle to put it together.

18. To you, budgeting means downloading the Mint app and literally never opening it again.

At least you downloaded it!!!
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At least you downloaded it!!!

19. You have, at one point, tried beginning a relationship by consistently making eye contact with someone who you think is cute.

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I mean you can't just TALK to them.

20. You have visited your parents at some point just because you knew it meant a balanced meal that you didn't have to pay for.

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And also because you love them, obviously.

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21. You've considered the major responsibility of getting a dog while simultaneously washing your underwear in the sink, because you didn't feel like doing a load of laundry.

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Responsibility at it's finest. It's those damn ASPCA commercials.

22. You haven't consistently been to the eye doctor or dentist since your mom stopped making the appointments for you.

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23. Your idea of keeping all of your financial paperwork organized means shoving it into the desk in your room that you've never actually sat at.

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At least it's all TOGETHER.

24. And honestly, you have NO idea what you will be doing a month from now, let alone a year from now and the future freaks you out.

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Just remember, you're not alone.