1. You've pretended not to smell a dirty diaper just so your partner has to change it.
2. You've skipped over pages while reading a book to your kid just to get to the end faster.
3. You've half-assed playing a board game so your kid can win and – mainly – so it could be over with faster.
4. You've convinced your kid to order something you wanted at a restaurant just so you could have a little side dish with your meal.
5. You've pretended not to have a babysitter to get out of doing something.
6. You've thrown away your kid's "art," and if they saw it in the trashcan, you totally acted like it was an accident.
7. You've counted swimming as a bath.
8. You've given your kid "juice" which was really just 90% water and 10% actual juice.
9. You've told your kid the food was "spicy" because you didn't want to share.
10. And you've told your kid a store was "closed" so you wouldn't have to go.
11. You've taken money out of your kid's piggy bank when you didn't have cash.
12. You've bribed your kid with your phone or tablet during desperate situations.
13. You've still got maternity clothes which you occasionally wear.
14. You've drank wine in place of dinner (but maybe snuck a few of your kid's leftover chicken nuggets).
15. You've made up a total lie about why the Tooth Fairy didn't show up when you really just forgot.
16. You've promised your kid something because you knew they would forget about it the next day.
17. You've left laundry in the dryer for days because you didn't want to fold it.
18. You've Googled a simple answer to your kid's homework.
19. You've gotten a sample for "your kid" at Costco when it was really just so you could have another one.
20. You've hidden from your kid... no, you weren't playing hide 'n' seek.
21. Speaking of hiding, you've also hidden snacks from your kids.
22. You've said "uh huh" to something your kid asked when you actually weren't listening at all.
23. You've picked mom friends based on who has the same interests as you, not the same interest as your kid. For example, if Kylie's mom likes wine, your kid and Kylie are new BFFs.
24. You've agreed to do something for your kid when you were distracted and then later did whatever it took to get out of doing it.
25. You've pretended to be in a deep sleep when the baby was crying in the middle of the night so your partner would have to get up.
26. You've been donating your kids toys every couple of months and they have yet to figure it out.
27. You've picked the picture where you looked best to post on social media, even if it was the shot where your kid was looking crazy.
28. You've gone through the drive-thru without your kid and eaten in your car so you can enjoy a few minutes of dining alone.