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Posted on Mar 1, 2013

Is This A Portland Strip Club Or Portland Coffee Shop?

Two things Portland is known for having in spades: nudie bars and hipster cafes. Can you identify which is which based on the name?

  1. 1. "Cellar Door"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Coffee Shop!

    They aren't just a coffee shop, they also roast their own coffee.

  2. 2. "Office"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Strip Club!

    Recently opened in the former Saratoga space, this is a great place to hang out and watch some nude people.

  3. 3. "The Red E"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Coffee shop!

    Eater.com calls the Red E "one of Portland's best independent cafes, with multiple single origin espressos on offer and a monthly rotating art show on the walls."

  4. 4. "Hawthorne Strip"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Strip Club!

    A review of this dive bar strip joint says, "My days off, evenings and days when I just don't show up for work are usually meant for "World of Warcraft". Those times when I step away from the game, and go to the Hawthorne Strip have been pleasant and profitable ones- good low profile joint." So apparently it's the go-to strip club for World of Warcraft fans there.

  5. 5. "Acropolis"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Strip Club!

    A customer reviewing the Acropolis says, "we met the hottest girl, kaylee she was like a supermodel straight off the runway- with the hottest ass. To top it all off, she wasn't a bitch- like most hot chicks."

  6. 6. "Public Domain"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Coffee Shop!

    A Yelp review says, "I just wish this place had cream instead of just half and half. But the black coffee by itself was very, very delish." Which is confusing because aren't they the same thing? And if there's only half&half, you just take your coffee completely black instead? Who DOES that?!

    yelp.com
  7. 7. "Extracto"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Coffee Shop!

    This place has some amazing latte foam art, as evidenced on its Facebook page.

    facebook.com
  8. 8. "Magic Gardens"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Strip Club!

    According to PortlandBarFly, Magic Gardens is known for "Suicide-Girl heavy for rush hours, natch, with an eclectic array lunch-ward."

  9. 9. "Dolphin"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Strip Club!

    There's also a Dolphin II and Dolphin III.

  10. 10. "Blue Kangaroo"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Coffee Shop!

    Located in the Sellwood neighborhood, the Blue Kangaroo roasts its own beans.

    yelp.com
  11. 11. "Maglia Rosa"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Coffee Shop!

    Maglia Rosa is so Portland that it shares a space with a bike shop, and has a "bike thru" lane.

    facebook.com
  12. 12. "Pallas"

    Correct! 
    Wrong! 

    Strip Club!

    One reviewer enthuses, "hot hot hot girls!" I guess that's all you need.

Coffee cup images by jenosaur on Flickr.

Hat tip to @jeb.

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