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    59 Things Jake Johnson Smells Like

    Based on briefly standing near him at a PR event.

    by ,
    Mike Coppola / Via Getty Images Entertainment

    Photo from aforementioned event; authors lurking out of frame.

    1. Masculinity

    2. Cedar, or maybe pine

    3. Cloves

    3. Cardamom

    4. Hope

    5. Probably "vetiver"

    6. That sign from Love Actually that says "To me, you are perfect"

    7. The act of chopping wood

    8. Social justice

    9. Motor oil

    10. Crude oil

    11. The constellation Orion

    12. Black coffee

    13. A handwritten grocery list

    14. Artisanal cheese

    15. A cornfield

    16. Wind chimes

    17. Lavender

    18. Aubergine, the plant

    19. Aubergine, the color

    20. Idealism

    21. Vengeance toward an ex

    22. Halls honey-lemon cough drops

    23. Carpenter jeans

    24. Rocky road ice cream

    25. A bonfire

    26. Grass

    27. Dawn, the time of day

    28. Dawn, the dish soap

    29. A bird made of hand-blown glass

    30. A rainbow, but a rugged one

    31. A bouquet of daffodils wrapped in flannel

    32. Moss

    33. Peppercorn

    34. The lights going down just before the concert starts

    35. Brad Pitt circa Legends of the Fall

    36. Cacao

    37. Gift wrap

    38. The pool where you learned to swim

    39. Fruit salad

    40. A worn-in leather sofa

    41. Ontology

    42. The handsomest golden retriever

    43. Fig

    44. Fig Newtons

    45. Clean laundry fresh out of a basket of kittens

    46. Kale that's been alchemized into a juicy steak

    47. Patience

    48. An almond

    49. A wisp of pipe smoke

    50. A glass of all of your dreams come true, stirred with a cinnamon stick

    51. The Central Park Boathouse

    52. Bulleit Bourbon

    53. The words "Your package is out for delivery"

    54. Milk

    55. Pewter

    56. Bramble

    57. The library in Beauty and the Beast

    58. Your favorite sweatshirt

    59. Almost nothing; just enough to be wide-open with possibility

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