1. On health care:
If you're Canadian, sure, you get universal health care, but you also must live in mortal fear of the smell of burnt toast
2. On fashion:
The problem with Halloween in Canada is that you need to find a way to fit your costume under your huge coat.
3. On entertainment options:
4. On that one guy that ~everyone~ knows:
Overheard a conversation amongst girls about "the biggest fuckboy in Parry Sound" at the hortons. Ten bucks his name is Dustin.
5. On common occurrences:
Typical Canadian Conversation: "Well that's somethin there." "Oh yeah." "OH yeah." "OHHH yeah." "OOOOHHHHHHHHHH--" *both turn into kettles*
6. On weather:
AMERICAN HORROR STORY: CANADIAN WINTER
7. On how to react to winter:
Helpful Canadian tips for snow-bound Americans: - just chill out - have a beer - lots of games on tonight
8. On Canadian content:
Canada needs to stop just ripping off American shows. There's Bachelor Canada. Amazing Race Canada. What next? Good Morning America Canada?
9. On national identity:
10. On the worst place in the country:
Toronto is the least liked city in Canada. Not to be a dick, but everyone who voted against us: have you been to barrie?
11. On Canadian women:
It's GIRLS' NIGHT! Lololol you know what that means!* ;) ;) ;) *discussing Canada's increasingly worrisome foreign policy *also manicures
12. On what sets us apart:
13. On Canadian TV:
Dance like no one is watching? In that case, dance like you're on a Canadian TV show.
14. On sports events:
Is watching the Super Bowl really worth it in Canada when we don't even get the awesome commercials?
15. On Canadian currency:
Is the Canadian dollar so bad cuz we're all losers?
16. On Canada Day:
"Happy birthday, America. Oh, our birthday? Yea, it was a few days ago. You forgot again. It's fine." - Canada
17. On citizenship requirements:
You're not a real Canadian until you've slipped on ice while changing the Shania Twain song on your phone.
18. On car accidents:
Guy apologized to me after I hit *his* car in a parking lot then a woman skied past me as I drove home, and THAT'S how I know I'm in Canada.
19. And on texting like a Canadian:
